Sorry to see that that was the beginning of your day. I’m hoping the rest of it was much better.

and then I read some of the comments and laugh a little.

I was always a 50/50 person… until I was laid off from my lucrative 6 figure job. The SO still has his lucrative 6 figure job so making $30K a year has been quite a change for my ego and our relationship. I just try and be honest with him. I let him know exactly what I can afford out each week – my budget includes: (1) coffee, (1) lunch, (1) dinner. That’s it. I also do not feel the need to go out very often whereas he does. When we go out… I typically buy breakfast or coffee (something in the under $30 range which I then mentally mark as my “dinner of the week”) and he buys the more expensive meals. Lately, I have been purchasing groupons and he pays the balance of the bill – that has worked out well for both of us. Our other rule: I buy groceries and make our “at home” dinners, which helps out the ratio as well….

As for vacations and fun stuff – we still typically split 50/50, or as a surprise to the other person. It’s a constant conversation and one that involves a lot of diplomacy. He randomly said yes to go out with his d.i.n.k (double income, no kids) friends and just our portion of the evening was $600…. I put in $100… because that’s what I could afford. I think he was annoyed until I pointed our that they are his friends, they made the plan, and he said yes without consulting me.

So… very long answer for a short summary: it’s often VERY uncomfortable, but talk it out. Otherwise it becomes this big issue for both of you. Sit down with your budget and explain it if you have to- and be fair: if you’re making the same or more than your significant other then WHY would you expect him/ her to pay more than you??

Good luck!
A

At your mercy,Fish.

Cordy.

PS. This is me begging. Not my best look but it sure beats Pajama Jeans!