I’m turning 30 this year. I have a nice, well paid job, a good education, a house of my own and a mortgage, two dogs and friends who love me. My confidence is not that bad, I don’t look hideous, I’m intelligent and emphatic. I’d say I’ve everything going for me.

Except for my relationship. I’m in a long term relationship that’s going nowhere. I’m with a man who is unable to meet my needs. A man whose needs I’m unable to meet. In a relationship that becomes more complicated every day. In an environment where we both are afraid to be the person that we really are. Where every disagreement is armageddon. Where all signs of love are looked at with suspicion.

I first wanted to leave him three years ago, I think. I don’t remember if I wanted out before that. But I did not dare do it. And every day is just another nail in the coffin. I’m terrified of leaving him – of what my life would become. So I guess I’ll spend the rest of my life with him. Where did I come to the point where I’d rather spend a lifetime suppressing my needs than leave my cohabitant?

Anyway, Fish, thank’s for offering perspective. I guess a lot of women have fallen into the same trap and I hope your post will help others leave it, even if I won’t.

Thank you fish!

Jim