my third attempt today

Oh, well THIS is fun. I just discovered that the last two draft posts I’d saved no longer exist. Gone! I’m going back and forth between sending a frantic email to the iVillage tech folks and just letting it go. You know, trying out this crazy Zen business I hear so much about.

In the meantime, I will tell you that this is kind of a hard week. It will end in celebration – rehearsal dinner Friday, wedding excitement Saturday – but tonight the Boy and I are attending a wake and tomorrow a funeral. I like black dresses. I do not like pulling them out for such occasions. Mourn with those that mourn has always been a tricky admonition for me. I don’t always know when to stop. It’s like, once the faucet is on, you’re gonna need a wrench and some duct tape to shut it off. This is why I can’t watch a lot of movies that other people find thrilling. I cannot stand to see other people (real or pretend, it seems) in fear or pain. No war movies, no horror flicks. I cried almost all the way through The Sixth Sense because that kid was scared. Does not compute.

Also, I will tell you that my nephew is probably the softest, most delectable little thug I’ve ever seen. He giggles! He smiles! Holy cow, he overwhelms me with want. Not that I’m asking for my own (Not. Now. Thanks, Universe), but eventually, I’d like to own one of those wee beauties. Pictures to follow.

14 comments to my third attempt today

  • lawyerchik1

    I empathize with your empathy. I used to cry at Mickey Mouse cartoons when the Mouse would get hit on the head or hurt in some way (I was maybe 2), and while I’m a little better now, I still have a hard time with others’ misery (real or fictional). I’d like to say ‘have a good time at the wake’ along the lines of ‘have fun storming the castle,’ but … get through it the best you can.

  • I also struggle with watching people hurt in movies or tv. I haven’t been able to get into 24, despite my in-laws love of the show. They torture people constantly, and kill new people each episode.

    and Babies are soft and cuddly…I’m so excited for my two to be here…

  • I’m with you on the whole hyperempathetic thing. My X of 7 Years in Tibet was telling me to watch Defiance. No thank you! Slumdog Millionnaire was more than enough excitement for me, thanks very much.

  • It’s in the genetic code. Babies are so damn cute, if we girls get too close, we want one. That’s why I keep them a minimum of three-feet away. :-)

  • CaliGal

    Wow, Fish…your week sounds like mine.

    Sorry about the funeral.

    Have fun at the wedding.

    Glad to hear your nephew is thriving!! (Yea!)

    And fear not, for the universe will answer in due time.

    Regards to the Boy. :)

  • randi

    This is the worst January in years! We lost a dear friend early in the month. Sorry for your loss.

    Enjoy the squishy baby! Little kids always make the hard times bearable ’cause you can kiss and cuddle them whenever you want. I feel so lucky to have my 3 year old for that…plus he’s still too young to argue about it.

  • kathsprout

    Sorry to hear about your week, Fish. I’m sending messages to my understanding of the Universe for you.

  • I’m so sorry for your loss. Thankfully you have have the sweet baby and boyfriend to hopefully make it a little more bearable.

  • Laura

    I always find funerals hard because even it it’s for someone I don’t know very well (and I’m there to support a friend), as soon as I see the deceased person’s family members and friends struggling to cope I lose it myself. And then I feel pathetic, as their loss is so much greater than mine, but I just can’t get my shit together. I really do need an off switch for the tears. I had hoped I’d outgrow this weakness …

  • Nat Loves Her Cat

    I have a similar thing with the empathy – only more with animals than people. I can watch people be sad or injured in movies and be ok with it – because I know they are actors. Animals, however, are not the same.

    In regards to the nephew – I have two nieces, the oldest is 2.5 years old. I can tell you, if you think it’s good now, it only gets better. So, so much better. The first time you hear your name come out of that little mouth you’ll want to die. Then when they think up things to say on their own rather than just parroting everything they hear? Total cuteness overload. You will go insane with auntie-love.

  • I wish I had some words of wisdom, but not only am I a ridiculous empathetic cryer, I can barely hold it together at any sentimental moment- including high school graduations. Until you’ve seen my red swollen face after the third speech about today being the first day of the rest of someone’s life, you haven’t seen obnoxious sentimentality.

  • annie

    I’m like that, too. I can’t stand the sight and sound of someone in pain (ironically, I’m a nurse!), not even in the movies, either. Weirdly, I’m totally addicted to Law& Order, though. Haha!

    Those wee beauties grow up super fast. I love babies, but I always enjoy giving them BACK to the parents at the end. Whew!

  • There just are no majic words.

  • Amber

    I can’t believe that nobody else has commented on … YOU CAUGHT THE BOUQUET!! So … has the Dork Lord started ring shopping yet?