What is this? Good cop/Bad cop?
Cop Who Thinks Am Funny and Charming called first. Answered said cop's questions with witty replies, and tone that says, "I'm carefree even though someone took my entire life savings and I don't even have enough money to wash my clothes," as had v. sexy voice and sexy voiced men generally like peppy gals. Gooood morning! After conversation ended and was feeling v. satisfied, Cop Who Thinks Am Stinking Liar called. THAT conversation did not leave satisfied feeling. Left icky residue, like furry sugar sweater on teeth after drinking Coke.
Am such trollop! Roommate says am in need of therapy. Am in need of something, for certain, though am not sure it's therapy. Had inappropriate-for-work email conversation with J, resulting in inability to concentrate on task at hand.
H: We have to start talking about something else. Now.
J: So how bout them Red Sox?
H: Yes. Baseball. Baseball is so very unsexy. Baseball players have bad bodies. Nothing hot about baseball.
J: Bats and balls.....
H: Damn. Ivory soap. 99.4% pure. Nothing sexy there.
J: Lets face it, I'm so perverted, I could make anything have to do with sex.
H: Yeah, so could I.
J: I can make Church Sexy.
H: What are you doing on Sunday?
J: Probably having sex in church.
H: Wanna share a hymn book?
Yes... I KNOW is v. bad and detrimental to mental health to exchange such communications with J. Especially when resulted in dinner invite. And yes, DID accept invite. And no, did not share metaphorical hymn book. Did go back to Js place after dinner, but made hummous and played violent video games. Knew that J had band practice and wondered why he did not hurry to take me home. Suddenly, were rushing out the door, late to practice.
J: Do you want to come with?
H: Sure. You know I love band camp.
J: Good. (grinning)
H: What?
J: Nothing.
Wasn't nothing. At band practice, learned that in collaboration, J and V. attractive lead singer had finally named tracks for soon-to-be made CD. Was v. surprised to find one named after yours truly. Spent entire song in half-daze trying to pick out lyrics from rest of sounds with v. noisy guitar amp too close to my head.
I have a song.
How v. sad, and v. funny is that?