November 04, 2003

another letter

whatever this madness is in me spinning like a top
on a bed of anxiety over a deep dark drop
down into nothingness
into withoutyouness

Hi,

It's been a while.

I was thinking of you this morning as I was cleaning the house in one of my fits of OCD-related fury. I made myself late again. But you know how that goes. If I can't make anything else right, at least the microwave will be clean.

I was missing our jokes about Advil bottles and closet doors. I'm getting better at closing the things I open, by the way. I still leave water on the bathroom sink, though. And I was missing our arguments about that. Then I stared missing the ways I never figured you out and the stories you forgot to tell me.

But mostly I was missing the way you knew all my faults and liked me anyway.

Love,

Me

Posted by This Fish at November 4, 2003 11:34 AM
Comments

That was beautiful and so true!

Posted by: Mala at November 4, 2003 03:43 PM

those lyrics haunt me. "i crave inertia, every move made so i can stop..."

and that is such a beautiful and raw letter. did you send it?

Posted by: julia at November 4, 2003 04:25 PM

You bitches are crazy.

Posted by: Rocco Yamamoto at November 4, 2003 08:38 PM

You write very well. Precise and concise and the words have a power all their own.

Posted by: finelyspungirl at November 5, 2003 04:03 PM

"And I was missing our arguments about that. Then I stared missing the ways I never figured you out and the stories you forgot to tell me."

So true so true. Just talked to the ex again tonight, and gawd.. if only he wasn't such a loser. He once had great stories to tell..

Posted by: tab at November 7, 2003 12:35 AM