This Fish Needs A Bicycle

I did it, and here I am, 11 years later, an ocean and a continent away from home (in Cambridge, funnily enough).

I'd give it 6 months and see what happened. If they're meant to be together there's no need for her to jump into the fire and completely change her life right this moment.

I'm the cynical, practical one.

Do they see a future together? If so, she better check her passport.

If not, then, well...

i'm with you fish, she should go. perhaps unless what she has to lose is too great to give up.

if i were her i'd go. new land, old love, nice little adventure.

Personally I like to take chances. Lets talk about that mini skirt & boots combo some more.

Take me to dinner. I'll wear the skirt. :P

Careful with that offer, your inbox will be flooded. ;-)

Seriously though, wow Cambridge!! Man I live in England (born and bred), and even I, never having been lucky enough, would kill to be at Cambridge.

Lets not forget the fact that the British Universities are amongst the best in the world. Oxford and Cambridge are the most prestigious and oldest universities around, they are institutions both loved and held in awe and as close to our hearts as are Buckingham Palace and the Houses of Parliament. (Obviously Royal foot-in-mouth-itis aside.)

The shopping here is amazing. Its the hub of European fashion and its quirky and unique designers are amazing. Also, more and more the UK is becoming a diverse and multi-cultural nation. That adds a lot of flavour and variety to life more so then in America. And thats what travel is about, new adventures and experiences, getting to grips with a new way of life and being ready to an eye opening experience.

Listen if it worked its charms on Madge and soon Britney then I'm sure your boss will love it too. Honestly, there are career opportunities over here and perhaps better ones.

Its better to have experienced something and given it a try rather then not to try at all. "You live and learn", and England especially Cambridge will be a great learning experience.

I'm with you. I think she should go. If she has to think about it and then decides to stay, she will be kicking herself every time she misses him.

Wow - not one person has said that she should stay, that amazes me and makes me feel wonderful at the same time!
See, I'm in the same situation. I live in England (and I LOVE this place with all my heart) but my boyfriend is in America which means I have to go out there for us to be together, reading all this afirmation about going for love and taking chances has really boosted my confidence in the matter! :)
I'd say she should go for it too by the way ;-)

Shopping? In Cambridge? You're having a laugh! ;-)

Wow, that is an amazing story. Tell her to GO TO ENGLAND! I'm residing there right now, albeit temporarily, and it breaks my heart to think about going home to freaking, frozen Minnesota in January.

For fear of being beaten by the comment mob, will hold back all bitter love-related comments for tonight.

Me too.

OK,
Why can't he stay? For real. Why does she have to adapt to him? If she was the one who got offered the job at Cambridge, would he pick up and leave? Somewhere inside of me there is a voice ranting on about gender socialization.

Professorships for his field of work (String Theorists) have three openings every year. And tenure at Cambridge is kinda special, wouldn't ya think? She does what I do for a living... every Monkey Firm in the whole world will have the same sort of job opening. 3 a week. We may be under-paid, but we're very marketable.
It's got less to do with gender roles than it does sensibility.
And believe me, if I weren't so certain that they're really quite an amazing fit, I'd say, "think about it for a while."
And it's not like, if I were her, I wouldn't worry that I'd move over there and things would fall apart, etc. Like I said, I'm being highly sentimental.
Those two crazy kids are really in love.

man, and i thought moving to brooklyn from upstate new york was a leap! mercy!

i agree, she should definately go, but then again, i absolutely adore england and would move back there in an instant if i had a job waiting for me. and cambridge may not be that much more than a college town, but what a university, and its still pretty decent in size. and just a train ride away from london, which is second only to nyc in awesome cities to live. if she doesn't try it, she'll always regret it i think.

if i stay it will be trouble. if i go it may be double.

Fish,
Of course I think a position at Cambridge is quite an opportunity and it would be tough to turn down, and I wouldn't expect him (or anyone else) to do so. I'm just thinking in general male-female relationship terms as opposed to this specific case because I obviously don't know anything about their scoop outside of your brief description. That's all. Been reading too much feminist theory recently, and apparently I've become hyper-sensitive!

Feminism doesn't mean never giving up everything to follow the man you love across the ocean, but having the option not to.

I'd probably take a temporary leave of absence, go to England, look for work there while testing the waters with Mr. Right, and see what happens.

Life is about adventure. Opportunity knocks, but it doesn't come though the door until you open it.

Hahahahaha!! Lisa, sweety, I wasn't commenting on the shopping in cambridge. (dare I even try??!)

No, I was saying that the UK in general, particular London , as its not a million miles away from Cambridge, is great for shopping.

Ok. I have to admit that the comments have taken an unexpected turn towards feminism and equality. But thats not what most of us, myself included were implying.

If it were the other way round I would say to the guy.... go dude, follow her across the sea. Gender roles have little to do with it.

At the end of the day, what we are discussing are relationships. Good or bad! Its that feeling of being in love, of literally in this case, following a loved one to the corners of the world. And although this comment sounds as though I've been watching too much of "Notting Hill"/ "Love Actually" ... let me assure you I've yet to see it.

But what is so wrong with love huh? Yeah its painful at times and it hurts, but its also got its ups. You only begin to notice the good times and miss them most when you sit in a lonely house wondering if your stubborn principles or your career are really going to keep you warm in the middle of the night.

I would love to be one half of a couple who have grown old together. You know who I mean, the ones that have the been married through it all and have survived to see the grandchildren. In this day and age its a rare thing and if it means you have to work hard for love and move continents for him/her then so be it.

I left my home, my family and all my friends to move to New Jersey because my fiance got transferred. He tried valiantly for six months to find a job in New Orleans, but, in the end, the economy in New Orleans sucks. I moved up here, found a job and walked away from everything in my life. Am I lonely? Hell, yes. Do I regret choosing him over the rest of my life? Not on your life.

In the end, if she loves him, she should go with him.