I think someone needs to explain to me how this happened. I was just clicking around Ye Olde Internets and I found this: People’s Hottest Bachelor, Mario Lopez. Really? REALLY? George Clooney is baching it up again and A.C. Slater is the hottest bachelor? Yeah, yeah, he’s all muscley and dimple cheeked but seriously? Maybe I’m being extra stubborn because I’m having a very, very hard time erasing images of Slater in his crazy acid-washed, wide-thighed, tight-ankled jeans. There was nothing hot about that. Even back then. And I know bad 80′s fashion happened to lots of folks (I had certain feelings about florescent pink t-shirts and black leggings that I wish I could forget), but have you ever seen George Clooney in a get-up like this?
No. No you haven’t. Mostly, you see George looking very accidentally, tummy twirlingly, handsome. Like, out for a bike ride or filling up his car at the gas station. I mean, I saw this photo and had to have a moment to myself.
Oh, People Magazine. It’s like hearing that Cameron Diaz is Hollywood’s highest paid actress all over again. I worry for the children.
Um hello!!! Have you forgotten about the Facts of Life years??? Helloooo, mullet!
http://img2.timeinc.net/instyle/images/2005/tr/041805_tr_clooney85.jpg
On another note, just wanted to mention that I’m a long time lurker (I think it’s been about 3 years now!) and a first time commenter. Love your blog!
Mario Lopez is only a bachelor because he couldn’t keep it in his pants during his bachelor party, that makes him instantly NOT HOT. I think Ali Landry would prefer Clooney (who is the bachelor of ALL bachelors) over Mario as well!
Agreed, completely!
amen!
I totally agree with you. I have nothing for AC, I was a Zach Morris fan from the start. And that picture of George? Sweet Jesus, that is one fine specimen of man. Maybe we should move to Vegas and become cocktail waitresses. Some say they have all the luck.
Mario is cute, but he does NOTHING for me. George is hot, hot, hot, but he looks like my dad so… ew.
But as Lala said, the cheating thing? So NOT HOT.
I’m so glad I stopped reading People.
One of my many (many) issues with this is the fact that his hair appears to be chemically straightened. I’m all for well groomed men, but that’s where I draw the line. If he’s so damn eligible, how come his most recent partners have been that chick from dancing with the stars, a hooters girl, the doritos girl and a stripper?
I mean, don’t get me wrong, I was pretty disappointed in Mr. Clooney for “settling down” with a cocktail waitress whose claim to fame was eating live bugs for a few thousand bucks, but at least she wasn’t a hooters waitress.
Maria Lopez – yuck, I don’t get the appeal at all. It’s like he’s trying to hard. He does nothing for me, and yeah – wasn’t he married to the doritos girl for like 2.5 days & managed to cheat on her? What a douche. Now George, ummm…..I can’t think of anyone I’d radther spend my days with.
i am not a mario fan … at all. i echo lala’s post above … he is only a bachelor because he is a dog … and that should disqualify him completely. as long as george is alive and single, he should always be the hottest bachelor … yum.
Amen! A guy who “needs his girlfirend to have her own passion”…ummm, hasn’t he just described all the women he has ever cheated on and then broken up with? Sorry, that is just not at all HOT.
I agree with ya, Fish (as usual)! (Ya know… you can feel free to thrown Johnny Depp into the mix and I won’t argue that one either.)
I guess Clooney was down-sized due to the girlfriend. And Lopez will forever be on the bachelor list because, let’s face it, he’s a man whore.
Oh. My. Wow.
Thank you for posting that picture of George. I usually don’t swoon so easily over the celebrities, but that picture is just. Wow. Hot.
I knew the world had gone bazerk when I saw Zach Effron as the Hollywood Hottest!! he is like 12!!!!!
Maybe it’s because we are both Latin. I see Mario as good looking*. I would never compare him to George Clooney. I think Clooney is a gorgeous man he is more than hot. The Hot title give it to mario because that just means for right now he is hot, but soon he will be old and well not soo hott. While George Clooney will forever be knows as THE handsome Bachelor.
*Cheaters are never HOT! he has been caught cheating twice now, 1. to Ali and 2. now he cheated on Karina!!!!
Thanks for that photo of George! That moment will get me through the rest of the work day
Yum-my!
I absolutely agree with you! You have got a great blog by the way. Keep up the great posts!
What…. is this world coming to!?
Hot = George, Mario = NOT. so. much.
Eww. Double eww. I echo your sentiments- he is NOT attractive.
I never could understand the attraction to Leo Dicaprio, though. While most women were swooning over him, I wasn’t at all.
Add Tom Cruise to that list too… even before the whole cuckoo act, I didn’t find him attractive. I think it’s because he’s too darn short.
http://andria-and-co.com
Oh my god-I am cracking up! I TOTALLY agree with you in the Mario Lopez thing! UGH ARE THEY FREAKIN KIDDING ME!?
By the way, I also had to say thanks for making me laugh today in an otherwise yuck day. My friend Erin sent me a link to you right before she just moved accross country to follow her dream job in Napa and said as far as she’s concerned you are one of the coolest people on the planet. LOVE IT. Love the blog, love your attitude and so glad Erin sent me your way! I’ll be checking back in regularly!
As for George Clooney: YUUUUUUMMY!
Good point Merry Widow, I had forgotten the mullet years! lol
I read the Go Fug Yourself & just had to get the I Love Intern George t-shirt. He’s so fine!
AND, George doesn’t chemically straighten his afro like Mario does – which makes him more of a natural beauty…err…hottie.
George Clooney is yummy. Who else is on your list (and even though I’m a first-time commenter, I’ve been reading for awhile and I know that you love Friends… so you have to know about The List)?
And adding insult to injury was people’s comparison of the Slater pic to Marky Mark’s original. Harumph.
GCloo’s hair looks so much better with the salt and pepper.
I just want to thank you for that picture of Clooney. You are so so right.
Plus the guy is a serial cheater. he cheated on his wife on their honeymoon and now they say he was cheating for a whole year with a girl who works at Hooters on that dancing with the stars girl he was living with.
So that means he’s selfish, has no conscience or respect for women. Please tell me how that classifies him as the Hottest Bachelor? I’m right with you on George Clooney..he’s a real man and so is Leonardo DiCaprio.
mm, he is a very handsome man.
OH yeah!
Thanks for sharing the George photo…. Ho.min.a. How is it that he can look so incredible and seem to looking right at you in that photo?!? That’s enough to make any sane woman swoon.
[Eliot Stabler would be so jealous.]
I perused this on the internet today myself and had the exact same reaction you did!!! I said to my coworker “they have got to be kidding????? Slater???” She, of course just laughed at me, but then we were both shocked when going through the other pictures to find out there was a Spears brother! Who knew??!! And he’s kinda cute.
You need to back up off of George Clooney, because destiny will soon bring us together, some how, some way, and he will be MINE!
Perfection.
Is it wrong that I am still in the middle of my “moment” with that picture? This could last for quite a while.
*happy shudder*
Mr. Clooney is in a league of his own
news of his break-up broke on my birthday – coincidence??
Lopez can thank his publicist for that… George is like the our Clark Gable. He’s so handsome and charming. Ok, I might need to take a moment myself.
George is just…YUMMY!! Great pic of him…
I wish I had something intelligent to say but my brain just melted when I saw that picture of George!!
Yep. I had to have a moment to myself after seeing that picture too.
George Clooney is hot!
This could not have been said better! Amen.
Well, at least Allison admits it. Lopez is a worthless human being, Clooney is a pillar of fidelity and unsleaziness? Please. They’re both good-looking guys who have done more than their share of dirt.. and have, miraculously, remained attractive. Other than that it’s a matter of personal taste, and maybe something else (derisive ‘afro’ comments, anyone?). My main complaint with Mario Lopez is the beefiness. Not a fan of the pumped-up look. Generally, though, if People magazine and all others like it suddenly ceased to exist, the world would seem just that much better.
Yea…Slater is def not the hottest bachelor. He’s attractive buuutt…how about gale harold/diddy…or i dunno. Just not slater rofl! I wonder if Clooney’ll ever tie the knot? He def gets better w/ age tho.
Given the choice between Mario and George, completely based on looks I’d go with Mario (current looks)
George has grown into his head and Mario has grown into his hair. It’s not really a good comparison to show an old pic of Mario and not show mullet-man George from the 80′s, LOL.
Seriously… it was all about Zack Morris back then. Slater was disgusting. Between that hair and only referring to Jesse as “Mama.” Nasty.
I can think of about 20 hot, single celeb bachelors off the top of my head that I would place far far above Mario Lopez. Dimples or not, the man is a serious dweeb.
Have they met Jake Gyllenhaal?! That man is gorgeous.
Who actually chose Mario?! A man, probably. By the looks of the comments, people who much prefer dating an older, hot guy…than a beefy, dimpled sitcom actor wearing fatigues!
and it’s photos like that one that make it so blatantly obvious why I recently had a dream that I cuddled with George Clooney in a bed while I waited to see the dentist. Sigh. Gotta love the Clooney.
Ew, Slater. Ew.
But I hate to be the bearer of bad news — Clooney was once a Slater type (in his Facts of Life days, mullet and all):
http://img2.timeinc.net/instyle/images/2005/tr/041805_tr_clooney85.jpg
Clooney just knew how to grow up really, really well.
Those things are all pre-arranged by publicists, agents, and managers to promote their clients. There’s no basis in reality when determining who’s the hottest bachelor, or sexiest model, etc. It’s strictly business.
But as a guy, I’m shocked that Slater is getting abused like this. Hes getting treated like Screech.
HAHA! I laughed out loud when I saw this- my roommates and I were saying the EXACT same thing yesterday! Seriously? Mario Lopez? It’s just impossible to take him seriously. Didn’t he host some pet show on animal planet? How did this guy make it back onto hollywood’s radar?
Also a lurker for many years but this posted ECHOED my sentiments exactly. An old girlfriend called me up yesterday morning to look up the bachelor list on PEOPLE.COM — I about choked on my coffee when I saw the #1 bachelor listed.
And I must be getting old because the list was full of pubescent little boys that have nothing on the likes of George Clooney.
I have now decided to save my money on that Special People Issue and use it for 2 men who have brought me much comfort and happy feelings:
Ben & Jerry.
Fish, you really need to put a NSFW warning on this. It is seriously not safe for me to see that photo of George while at my desk and then be expected to resist humping the filing cabinet…. or the intern….whatev.
have to add a SATC quote here: “What did women do before Russell Crowe?” “George Clooney!”
“….Clooney just knew how to grow up really, really well…” – Plastic surgery will do that for an old guy.
Both are pretty enough, not my type….but come on – these are actors. Did you ever see Woody Allen’s “the Purple Rose of Cairo”? You are seeing the character on the screen, not the actual actor/sleaze . They are both dogs – at least Mario didn’t sell out his own union out of movie star pique while relaxing at his mansion in Italy.
Just himbos, nothing more folks. The pool ain’t as deep as it seems at times.
Ewww… some of the men on the list make my skin crawl. BRETT MICHAELS is on there… more skeezy than sexy. As in, you wouldn’t want to catch anything from him! And yes, Mario Lopez is gross. Maybe because I’ll always think of him as he was in Saved by the Bell.
Mario Lopez will never be hot… He thinks way too highly of himself. Give me a guy who doesn’t know how good looking he is any day.
I have to echo the it’s a little unfair to use a current pic and an 80s pic. I mean, I’m willing to vote I could be considered more attractive in a good current picture than most people in an 80s one, but not due to really being more attractive. You could still make your point here without resorting to . . . viewer manipulation, maybe? yeah, that’s the word. because I totally agree with you.