“It’ll be like Wedding Crashers… only, you know, with Christmas parties.”
Jamie laughed, but I meant business. See, I believe it’s one of the world’s great injustices that a girl with a closet full of little black dresses – a girl who loves nothing more than to get gussied up and spun around on a dance floor – doesn’t have a fancy holiday party to go to. Think Tiny Tim without his Christmas goose.
Totally tragic.
Friday night, Laura, Jamie and I sat around a table at the Tipp, discussing how we were going to right this colossal wrong. I was willing to do what it took. If crashing wasn’t going to work, well, I was this close to hiring myself out as an escort for the season. And that’s when the Universe intervened.
They’d been watching us from across the bar, and had even performed not-so-sly flybys of our table on the way to the men’s room. But when the two older guys finally came to talk to us, it wasn’t to deliver some cheesy, overused line. It was to deliver invitations. To a black tie charity event.
“We have to go!”
Laura couldn’t be persuaded, but after a little coaxing Jamie got on board. And Saturday night, after a little schedule shifting and a quick wardrobe change, Jamie and I were on our way to White Rock Lake, primped, preened and… a little nervous.
“This is only mildly crazy, right?”
“No,” Jamie said. “It’s totally crazy. But that’s what I love about it.”
At worst, we figured, the party would blow. We’d go in, make a charitable donation, take advantage of the open bar, get bored and go home early. And at best? Well, two hours later, when I found myself on my fifth glass of holiday punch and on round II of The Plastic Surgery Game (fifty cents for spotting an obvious boob job; a buck for a face lift) with a dozen or so men in tuxedos, I decided the evening had more than qualified for an at best rating. The rest of the night is just a little fuzzy, but it involves champagne and dancing and breakfast at 3AM in Cafe Brazil with Jim the Insurance Guy and his sidekick, Trey the iPhone Man.
My feet are blistered, my head is thumping, and lethal amounts of Pad Thai were required to soak up the mess of holiday punch that was still sloshing around in my stomach when I crawled out of bed this afternoon. But isn’t that the way all good holiday stories end? Well, that and a good goosing.
God bless us, every one.
LOVE IT! One thing that always bothered me about freelance work was the lack of holiday parties that corporate friends grudgingly endured and I secretly yearned for.
And LOVE the Plastic Surgery Game. I occassionally work at charity benefits, and with those rules I should have a down payment on a brownstone in no time
A good goosing?
Yep, that’s how ALL good holiday stories end.
Glad to see that you’re getting geared up for the holidays!
Trey always has an iPhone, so it would seem. That zany Trey. He’s “the third” of what, I wonder?
Sounds super fun! No Scrooge are you! But at least you crawled out of your own bed…lol.
I love Cafe Brazil… any good holiday story should at the very least include a great 3am breakfast!
WAY better than any holiday party!
I miss Cafe Brazil, the really tiny one in Oak Lawn. Mmmm chorizo tacos and coffee beans in as many flavors as jelly bellies. (I think some of the same flavors too).
I guess this is as good a place as ever to comment, I have been a reader for awhile. And I got myself into a situation like you did a few years back… that J thing. Reading all of your writing helped me to be okay with what happened between my guy and me and helped me be able to forgive him and stay friends!
Your writing helped change my life and saved a very good friendship. Thank you
God, I miss those days. Sometimes the best experiences in life are when you fly by the seat of your pants, or dress…whatever. Say hi to Trey the iPhone man for me.
I too attended Christmas in the Park. After the awkward stares from the people who were easily older than my grandfather subsided my 20-something roommate and I decided to also partake in the holiday punch, open bar AND free finger foods. After all, what are holiday parties for?
Fantastic! Nicely played.
I’ve had a few parties like that. Ah, good times.
This post makes me long for my youth. I used to LOVE Christmas parties, meeting funny strangers and waking up mi-day Sunday with a giggle and a Bloody Mary!
Damn, sounds like a great weekend! Glad to hear it worked out so well, and that you got the chance to bust a move on the dancefloor that night. Dancing while slightly intoxicated is always a lot of fun, especially when you have a cute guy in a suit twirl you around. : )
I am so beyond jealous.
Never heard of the plastic surgery game, I’ll have to try it. Though, ’round here it might be the “spot the fake rich person” version, or “spot the wannabe mobster” version. Spotting the real mobsters is way too dangerous.
A great read
You have a way with words. Very funny, and always with a wry twist.
I miss getting in wacky situations like this one. It’s the downside to being happily engaged- no swinging older men to swoop me away. Oh well. Unfortunately my government job doesn’t come with good Christmas parties either.
I love that you did this. My life needs to be more like this and less like laying around on the couch watching reality tv, haha.
it pays to be spontaneous! such a fun experience. how can i get myself randomy invited to an event like that!?
That is awesome! I love it.
Look at you! All dolled up! That sounds like one fun charity event. I also brought my little black dress (and a blue one), and am currently lacking a holiday party to go to (well, one that requires dressing up)! I’m glad you got yours though
Wow – small world – I have been reading you for a couple of years and then you end up at the party my husband and I host with other people every year. Wish I had known – I would have kept an eye out for you! I was the girl who was wearing the same silver and black striped sequin dress. Let me know if you would like an invite next year. Definitely, a great party
. You should also go to the Marguerita Ball next year. Like Christmas in the Park but bigger and in November – I prefer Christmas in the Park, but you know – another dress up party!
this post made me miss the following:
1. my old roommate who could turn any wednesday night at the bar into a “holiday party” of sorts
2. waking up at 3 p.m. on sunday without any feelings of regret
3. being single (but don’t tell the new guy that)!
in all, i’m glad you had great time, and the read was worth you rubbing it in a little!
You look gorgeous in that picture and I’m glad you went & had a great time.