When I tell you I came *this* close to taking a dive off my icy front steps this morning, I’m not exaggerating in the slightest. Which, you know, is sort of standard operating procedure around here. Who doesn’t love a little hyperbole? But this morning, as my feet started sliding out from under me and I grabbed the railing (sending my purse flying, along with one of my shoes), my mind suddenly filled with visions of broken noses and horrific dental injuries. I don’t know how I didn’t fall, and I must have done some hollering, because my downstairs neighbor came out to see if I was okay. Um, yeah, don’t mind me. By then I’d managed to plant my tush and take stock, but I was all shook up. Seriously, Texas? I mean, I enjoy a good near death experience as much as the next girl, but generally not before 8AM.
And… end whine.
So, I was just looking at my Christmas shopping list and I gotta say I’m feeling damn proud of all the progress I’ve made. There are little red check marks everywhere. Mom? Little red check mark. Sister-in-Law? Check mark. Ordinarily, I’m a bit hopeless about this kind of stuff. Orinarily, you’re pretty lucky if your Christmas present wasn’t purchased the day before and shoved into a too-big gift bag that says, “Happy Birthday, sassy gal!” and padded with old resumes and WalMart circulars. Holiday gifts – or gifts in general – should never be taken as a measure of my affection. Except this year, naturally. Because this year I am on it and the depth of my love will be profoundly felt with each thoughtful, appropriate (and appropriately wrapped!) gift I give. So many gold stars! I’ve yet to pick up the Boy’s gift, becasue well, I had to put some thought into that one. After all, a gift is supposed to send a message, and it isn’t exactly easy to find a gift that says, “Merry Christmas. I really like you, so don’t eff this up.”
LOL!
Sounds like you’re about to have an amazing holiday season! Good for you! Enjoy it!
Happy New Year too! I(we)look forward to (hopefully) having you share your thoughts and hysterical stories throughout 2009!
OH! And sorry about the ice thing…. We’re having our own little “frosting” out here…. (I wore my red scarf today. Looks decent, I must say.) Although, by Thursday morning, I’ll be on the beach in sunny South Florida, where it’s currently showing a high of 81.
(Mom!! I’m home for the holidays!)
Thank you again, Fish for another wonderful year of the most amazing blogging…EVER! Happy Hoidays…. Everyone.
I have no idea how I haven’t managed to trip and fall on ice yet! The weather is so cold here in southern England.
Congrats on your Christmas shopping list; I still have a long way to go to finish mine!
What happens if the check mark isn’t red?
speaking of the Boy…do we get a story of how you met? I hope you have a wonderful holiday season.
“Merry Christmas. I really like you, so don’t eff this up.”
…that was EXACTLY what I was going for when I coerced my very own boy into going WITH me to pick up his present. Of course, we have been dating almost six months…so I felt like indulging him – - and got a 32″ LCD TV.
He was happy to oblige, and accept the gift…on two conditions: It is called ‘our’ TV and will live at his house until we find a place of ‘our’ own. Soon.
Hope you’re having as much fun with your boy as I am having with mine!
A similar situation happened to me on my way down the dreaded apartment steps at 6:15 in the am…But I must ask this very important question:
Did you bust out the ass of your favorite jeans too? Oh, and break a fake fingernail?
No?
Hmmm…I think I officially win. Although I had no neighbor, or husband for that matter, asking if I was okay.
Cheers to Texas and its unbelievably unpredictable weather!
i am surprisingly close to finishing my Christmas shopping, too. usually, i’m just getting started in mid-December.
“I really like you, so don’t eff this up,” is too funny. i’ve been with my “boy” for 20 months now, so there is a bit less pressure than there was last year. i can’t wait to give him his gifts.
i second Carrie’s suggestion about the story of how you met your boy. of course, in your own time.
It’s icy in Texas?? Sheesh. I bought my non-boy a little magnet. It has a bicycle on it (because he’s a bike guy) and it says “Put the fun between your legs”. I hope he laughs too!
“Holiday gifts – or gifts in general – should never be taken as a measure of my affection.” Amen, sister! Glad it’s not just me. Sorry about the fall — so scary. I slipped once and bounced my infant daughter’s head off the pavement. She was totally fine, but I sobbed for an hour straight, and panicked every time she took a nap that day.
I hear that! Finding a gift for a new guy is tough – you want something cool, but not overboard and you don’t know how into it he’s going to be so you dont’ want to get him more than he gets you. It’s tricky, but I know you can do it.
Glad there was no dental injuries.
You can call yourself a “green” girl with reusing all the resumes and walmart circulars. Did you really do that? lol.
Happy Holidays.
I’m dating someone now and am in the same boat re: gift giving . Thanks for capturing it so nicely.
He’s a geek, right? Get him something kinda geeky and incorporate your message somehow. For example, get him a GPS and program your address as his first address, hehe. Or heck, does he have an iPhone (and do you have a bit of cash)? You could always have it say “I like you so don’t eff this up” right on the front…
I am in California this week, so missed out on all your icy fun. Glad you didn’t bust anything valuable, like your ass.
You deserve your wonderful Christmas season, Fish!!!!
Please…tell me what gift says “Merry Christmas, I really like you, so don’t eff this up…”
I need one, STAT!
“…it isn’t exactly easy to find a gift that says, “Merry Christmas. I really like you, so don’t eff this up.”
That’s what CafePress is for. They could do a t-shirt, a mousepad, or just about anything else with that statement exactly printed on it – even colors and pictures, if you want.
I’ve been reading your blog for a few months now and I absolutely love it! I really hope the Boy doesn’t eff things up, they tend to do that often. Have a super fabulous Holiday season!!
XOXO
Sarah
I’ve been reading your blog for a few months now and I absolutely love it! I really hope the Boy doesn’t eff things up, they tend to do that often. Have a super fabulous Holiday season!!
XOXO
Sarah
I’ve been reading your blog for a few months now and I absolutely love it! I really hope the Boy doesn’t eff things up, they tend to do that often. Have a super fabulous Holiday season!!
XOXO
Sarah