Am having daydreams about minor natural disaster occuring at workplace so will have to go home, put on v. soft yoga pants, make tea, and bond with Reluctant Kitten for remainder of day. Find self staring at fire alarm, willing it to sound off, and being v. disappointed that sadly, possess no Carrie-like telepathic skills. Some things are simply and completely unfair. Not that I want to be doused in blood of smelly barn-yard animal or hurl knives at UMF with mind-power, while wearing silly nightgown. Hardly. But could really use a day off.
Am legitimately starting to feel sick, although, as am certain is result of current office stress, refuse to buckle and abandon ship. Am so v. important and necessary to resolution of major office crises (printer errors, malfunctioning staplers and corrupted fucking files alike)... that must not leave these people to their own devices.
Lunch-date Conversation:
A: Those new boots?
H: Ummm... kinda, I guess.
A: Not a scratch on them.
H: Yes, there is. See? Besides, I just take good care of my things, A.
A: No, I know you. You probably have 30 pairs of shoes in your closet and these look good because you rotate and probably only wear them once in a blue moon.
H: I used to be worse. I probably had 30 pair of black shoes back in the day. This is an improvement.
A: Back when you used to buy your entire identity?
H: Easy! You really think I'm completely baseless, don't you?
A: Just waiting for you to call me a hypocrite. By the way, is that a new jacket?
Quote from all-time favorite movie running through head, "So you think that's all I am? Just a ditz with a credit card?"
Will not be having lunch with A anytime soon. He makes this fish feel horrible.
Posted by This Fish at September 17, 2002 10:36 AM