Am not feeling quite right.
Happens from time to time, when either cosmic forces or brain chemicals are not aligning properly. Feel v. suddenly isolated at thought of spending holiday away from family members. As member of five-sibling clan, quiet Christmas morning will feel v. v. strange, am sure. Would prefer to spend said jolly time at home, feeling adequately sorry for self and/or pretending is not holiday at all, rather mid-week sick day or some such break from work. Would rather skip over the day altogether. However, Concerned Roommate said will not allow such wallowing and has insisted that yours truly join her family for the holiday. Am v. hesitant.
Spent lovely dinner with Concerned Roommate and her mother last weekend and had to leave table when found self overwhelmed with own misery in company of v. gracious and hinged mother figure and v. in-love roommate. Had quick cry in ladies room stall before returning to candle lit table.
GalPal has self clawing at face over new, excited, giddy state of being enamored with new-found love potential. While am deliriously happy for well-deserving friend and do not begrudge her this Miracle on 99th Street, am wearing horrid shroud of self pity and, if am honest, jealousy. Green is NOT good color on this unnatural blonde.
Perhaps simply need more sleep. Or warm bath. Indeed. Will do just that... in 8 hours. Silly monkey job.