The comment:
"Fish, no, I'm not bitter. But that's the usual reaction of vain women to criticism. I gave your blog a chance and in the past have praised you - as you know. Oddly, while you were in the throes of J pain, you seemed to write. Now you're a steady diet of "look at me look at me" with no expression of interest in anything outside your own need for attention. It's just boring. So yeah, I'm going to stop reading. I appreciate writers not jewish princesses."
The response:
Okay, first thing’s first. I was raised Mormon, not Jewish.
And now that we got THAT out of the way…
Vain? I’d have to out on a limb and say yours is the reaction of one rabidly unhappy woman. Honestly, if you read here you’ll see that I debase myself more often than praise myself. Some days, I feel like hiding in my room with all the blinds pulled shut. And some days, I want to prance around singing selections from West Side Story. I do believe that is what one would call normal.
J had a way of eroding my self-confidence that made me deeply miserable. The fact that I’m not now, and that it bothers you, speaks nothing of my writing. What I have always been a steady diet of is… well, me. Me then was morose and self-conscious. Me now, is less so. Much less so.
I don’t always have something deep and meaningful to write about here. But it’s my journal and if I want to write about sitting around in my underwear eating brie, then that’s what I’m gonna do. If I want to post about loving my ass three days in a row, I will. I guarantee there will be just as many posts about hating it. And if it’s boring, don’t read it! You won’t be missed.
Look at me. Look at me.
I think it's funny when people forget that most people who write in journals/blogs/whatever the hell you want to call them write for themselves. Me? I could care less how many readers I have. Even if I knew no one was reading it, I'd still do it. Write what you want, if someone else doesn't like it, seriously - who cares? They can close the browser and not come back. No biggie.
Posted by: Alison at February 7, 2004 02:19 PMAlso, honestly, what kind of soulless person doesn't like Jewish princesses? I think neediness is adorable!
Posted by: Steve at February 7, 2004 04:12 PMAnyone who describes a bruise on her ass as being the "size of a small Baltic country" has my eternal respect, admiration, and audience time...
As to those who criticize I ask that they sit down and write something every day. It aint easy...
Mormons rock!
Posted by: michael at February 7, 2004 04:19 PMon a day of needed, you made me laugh. thanks!
um...yeah, that was supposed to be, "on a day of need."
Posted by: bikefox at February 7, 2004 04:58 PMdamn, and I thought I was the only one with 3 good ass days in a row...drat...I've also had 4 good hair days this week, 4! That's saying a lot with all the snow we've had. Oh jeez, now I'm being vain. K, don't send me an email or sing me any Carly Simon. {snicker, snicker}
Fish, the blog is great!
Posted by: Blue at February 7, 2004 05:10 PMLately it seems to me that any time a woman has anything positive to say about herself, someone calls her vain. Whaddupwiddat? Even when she says something negative, she's STILL vain. I recently told a male friend of mine that I was having trouble leaving the house due to Abnormally Bad Hair, and he said, "sounds like someone is a little vain." Jeeze. Anyway, Fish, I personally love reading you--it's good to know someone else has Good Ass Days as well as Bad Ass Days :)
Posted by: tumtum tree at February 7, 2004 05:28 PMI don't know about other readers, but I'm looking forward to you reading about sitting around in your underwear eating brie. Or about loving your ass three days in a row. Sounds enticing to me. :D
I hadn't discovered this blog when H was in J pain. (I still have to catch up on the archives.) But the happier H's writing and daily insights, I'm immensely enjoying.
Love your writing. Keep doing what you do. (As if I needed to say so.) :-)
Posted by: AlterEgo of NYC at February 7, 2004 05:49 PMif that was me, i would not even of responsed. it's a blog and blogs come off to non bloggers as self absorbed.
so i saw FUCK EM, they're just jealous, fish!
i'll keep reading.
Posted by: kasey at February 7, 2004 06:47 PM...don't let the door hit you in the ass as you leave!
On another note, less than 6 days before Miss Thing had her attack of troll-itis, H was good enough to share one of the most personal, well-written items I've seen in ages. http://thisfish.com/Archives/000528.html
Remember that?
Oh right...because when J was messing her up, she was SUCH a better writer. I thought she was funny then. But H is a far better writer now.
Posted by: Paul Gutman at February 7, 2004 07:02 PMWrite on!
Posted by: sam at February 7, 2004 07:18 PMHow silly and well, just silly. Your writing is always real, no matter what mood you in, and I appreciate that.
I'm also glad that you're happier now. That makes no sense to me that someone would want to read melancholy posts all the time. :P
Posted by: tab at February 7, 2004 07:32 PMScrew 'em if they can't take a joke. And jokes at the expense of one's own ass should always be appreciated.
Posted by: Martha at February 7, 2004 08:22 PMSounds like someone's just a tad bit jealous to me... If confidence and humourous self-deprication aren't entertaining, I don't know what is. If politics has tought me anything it is that you just can't please all the people all the time--so keep up the excellent writing and shameless "look at me" posts. More More!
Posted by: Yankee at February 8, 2004 12:15 AMJournals are journals. They're self centered by definition. And for what it's worth, I love coming here even more now than I did earlier on because it's nice to see that someone else's range of emotions reflects my own. Fuck 'em.
Posted by: jennn at February 8, 2004 02:37 AMBoo. I hate people who say such craptacular things about blogs. You go goyum! and eat your brie with matzot. oy...(sorry, southern baptist should not do that)
Posted by: Lyz at February 8, 2004 08:09 AMI'll confess -- I discovered you this week and read all the archives up to today. Part of it is because I happen to be a Texas girl who has dreams of being a writer who found herself in a professional position up here in Boston, but mostly because your writing is fresh and strong. You've discovered the secret of writing blogs without the reader being smashed over the head with I I I I I I I, and you use fantastic verbs.
Now, I recall some entries a while back about this blog taking on a life of it's own, a character not precisely you due to the large readership and lack of J-angst. Maybe the naysayer took your own doubts to heart. The criticism about your blog being too personal is just, well, lunacy. But you know that.
Keep writing. You rock.
Posted by: bisous at February 8, 2004 09:20 AMI've been reading you for over six months without commenting, but I couldn't not saying something.
As far as I'm concerned, the J-less version is new and improved. You're funny as hell, witty, and interesting. I'm not saying the previous writing that J-centered was bad, it was great, but I like hearing about YOU!
Posted by: Kyria at February 8, 2004 09:27 AMFish, you rock, don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise! I've been addicted to your blog for nearly a year now and stop by almost every day, and probably will, as long as you keep writing.
Posted by: emma at February 8, 2004 09:54 AMI always knew you didn't have any talent.
Posted by: Rocco Yamamoto at February 8, 2004 05:15 PMwhat else is a blog for if not 'look at me'? Silly, silly person...
Posted by: saara at February 8, 2004 06:37 PM1) Fish has a great ass to which even I would devote more than a few posts too.
2) What? You want her to be miserable so you feel better about yourself.
3) Fish's ass still rocks.
4) Look at Fish! Look at Fish! Look at Fish!
5) Sigh...I love this woman...maybe we just need to run off and get married and have an open relationship so we both get what we need because we both so know that neither of us do it for each other.
Posted by: Brian. the 646 Guy at February 8, 2004 09:40 PMSpeaking of leaving a mark ... ;-)
Posted by: Lex at February 8, 2004 10:13 PMwell i have been reading this blog for a while now, and i even had a link to your blog as well. you are an interesting breed, i enjoy reading your blog, it reminds me of a sex in the city episode, keeps me laughing and on my toes! as far as that asshole's comment, he/she is just jealous of your popularity! :) keep writing, girl!
Posted by: london at February 9, 2004 01:36 AMMisery loves company. Some people are happiest when other people are down with them.
Posted by: Jenna at February 9, 2004 08:57 AMYes, I thought blogs were for personal output of any kind. And if you're a jewish princess, or a mormon tabernacle, or a midget stripper that races motorcross, it's yours to write...see the little "X" at the top left it makes the selfish bitch go away! Geese. Who's lamerer the blogger or the blogger critic.
Anyway, H, get back to making me laugh, or you'll see the sawbucks starting to dry up.
Bye.
Posted by: Country Mike at February 9, 2004 10:42 AMRock on Fish! I love it, someone writes in to complain about YOUR writing on YOUR WEBSITE!!! Hey if you don't like get a website of your own and let us read it and then let us complain to you.
Good writing Fish and to all those out there, just try writing a blog everyday and I think you will find it quite hard to be as interesting as our friend fish!
Posted by: Fletch at February 9, 2004 10:46 AMgood job! you got the last word in!
Posted by: hubs at February 9, 2004 01:51 PMcomment-box criticism makes baby jesus cry.
Posted by: bryan at February 9, 2004 02:14 PMwhatever. love yourself and rock it out loud. you should.
Posted by: mingaling at February 9, 2004 03:01 PM"All this being comfortable with yourself is making you boring, please have more tortured, confidence-damaging relationships, it made your blog a lot better."
The hell?
Posted by: Brenda at February 9, 2004 05:41 PM