In a meeting just now, a discussion was going ‘round the table about possible business contacts in a foreign city. Remembering that a certain coworker often bellows about his twenty-six years of owning his own business in that very place, I offered,
“Loud Larry should know plenty of people there.”
The table went silent. Silent and smirky.
“Loud Larry?” My boss halted a laugh and turned to face me. “Does he know you call him Loud Larry?”
“Well, no. But he is loud. He has to know.”
And if he didn’t know before, he does now. He just heard me telling this story to another coworker. Classic. Like the time I told one of our higher-ups that he was “in love with protocol and wanted to have its babies.”
I need a new filter.
***
Weekend stories to come…
HAHAHAAH! *collapsing in a fit of laughter*
Posted by: Jess at February 7, 2005 11:45 AMYeah filters are overrated, as long as you're not hurtful I think you should say what you think!
Posted by: Robin Alexa at February 7, 2005 12:04 PMOoops!! He can't possibly be insulted, though!
Posted by: Violet at February 7, 2005 12:06 PMOh, my God, the protocol line is hilarious!
My sister tells people with similar proclivities, "You're SUCH a J!," J being the classification in the Myers-Briggs personality scale that includes people attached to rules for rules' sake.
You'd have to be related to us to get that.
Posted by: Lex at February 7, 2005 12:11 PMThose inner monologues can be so adamant about coming out. I feel your (somewhat humorous, somewhat embarrassing) pain.
Posted by: Esther at February 7, 2005 12:18 PM*giggling* that is SO funny.... and you're right -- loud people HAVE to know they are loud. i bet everyone in that meeting was about to lose it. :)
Posted by: red at February 7, 2005 12:39 PMHeh. Larry should be taking the hint. I'm sure he's annoying too.
Posted by: Jen at February 7, 2005 12:42 PMI empathize. I'm a little light in the filter department myself.
Posted by: LiAps at February 7, 2005 01:13 PMThere used to be this saturday night live skit about the loud family. It was hilarious. And then I encountered a real life loud family. It was exruciating being in their midst.
Posted by: anon at February 7, 2005 01:43 PMOh my! I think I'm going to die laughing. I love the protocol line; it's absolutely hilarious. If you don't mind, I think I'll be using it, OFTEN!
Posted by: Aeriale at February 7, 2005 02:07 PMI was born without a filter between brain and mouth. Unfortunately, I have thus far been unable to secure any celebrities to get behind supporting research for a cure.
Perhaps now filterlessness can come out of the shadows and get the funding it deserves.
Posted by: G at February 7, 2005 03:08 PMIf you get a filter, i'm going to cry. Please don't mess with us like that. You're just messing with us, right? I like my fish unfiltered.
Posted by: brandon at February 7, 2005 03:34 PMdo you realise how arrogant and... mean you sound here? instead of saying 'i hope he wasn't offended when he heard' you say 'classic'. i've been reading since your nyt article but i think this will be my last time.
Posted by: beth at February 7, 2005 04:22 PMHahahahaha.I have come to the conclusion that I have an irreplacable filter. It broke once...in second grade, its gotten worse ever since. Plus, Collin Farrell was born without one...and how perfect is he? Absolutely Perfect.
Posted by: Jasika at February 7, 2005 04:37 PManything other than freshly brewed fish is just not acceptable...
seriously though, i think you should have disclaimers before posts with hilarious one-liners like "in love with protocol and wanted to have its babies." just so that those of us who are at the library reading this do not make everyone stare at them angrily when said person bursts into a fit of laughter
Posted by: ak at February 7, 2005 04:38 PMIf a person's been reading this site for a really long time, they should know you are not vindictive or mean spirited. Some people are just too sensitive and jump on the smallest little oversight. I've never thought you to be or sound arrogant.
Posted by: Lisa at February 7, 2005 04:42 PMThanks, Lisa.
Though... I do apologize if that sounded evil. Because, really? What I meant was: That Was Clasically Awkward and Foot in Mouth of Me.
Posted by: Fish at February 7, 2005 04:44 PMSometimes something funny is also mean. And you aren't mean-- at least you don't seem mean to a perfect stranger across the country.
I mean it's not like you outed him in a meeting.
As a naturally loud person in an unnaturally loud family-- we do know we are loud. We just don't know how annoying it is to those of you who aren't.
I'm loud and my filter only works on odd numbered Sundays.
M.
Posted by: Michelle in San Diego at February 7, 2005 05:11 PMLooks like loudness is contagious. But really, he needed to find out somehow. Just think about how many poor people around him have suffered through his LOUDNESS. Filter shmilter.
Posted by: pismire at February 7, 2005 07:44 PMI think most of us interpreted the "That Was Clasically Awkward and Foot in Mouth of Me" correctly - your audience knows you better than to think otherwise. I never thought twice about it until I read the comment. There will always be the few that read faster than they think I guess.
Posted by: Amy at February 7, 2005 09:22 PMAs a filterless individual, I stand by all others without a filter. Don't bother getting one. Being filterless is good for the soul and saves on therapy funding. Also, filters get clogged sometimes and need regular cleaning. So not worth it.
Posted by: Lisa M at February 7, 2005 10:20 PMI once called my co-worker "Chatty Kathy" to another and it got back to her. Didn't slow her down one bit. UGH.
Posted by: Peruby at February 7, 2005 10:48 PMHilarious! That is something that would happen to me... a couple of days ago at work I was recounting a story to a coworker that involved another coworker referring to our boss as "butt lips". The boss walked up just as I was finishing the story.
Posted by: Amber at February 8, 2005 12:33 AM