psalm 34B

On the upside to having gained ten extra pounds since August, have noticed substantial growth in normally barely-there chest. Stood in front of mirror this morning, trying to untangle over-grown mane from bra clasp and noticed,

My cup runneth over!

Yes, well, so do those boy-cut Gap undies you love so much.
I’m not responding to that.
Fine. Are you going to respond to J’s email, then? You know, the one where he says he misses you?
Not sure.
Ahem. A resounding “no” would make me feel much better. I mean, how can he, with one breath, mention something New Girl said about you, and then utter a declaration of missing you with the next? Come on!
My thoughts exactly.
You mean we *gasp* agree??
Yes, but don’t get used to it.
Well, get used to that new ass of yours, missy. Thinking about going to the gym isn’t do it any good.

Am horrified by the thought that the season for prancing about in bikinis and tummy revealing tops is on its swift and merry way. Dear lord, smite me with a parasite. Please?

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