When I was in high school, our community participated in Turn off the TV Week – an attempt, sponsored in part by the baby jesus, at bringing families together… through complete boredom due to a lack of visual stimulation.
I hated Turn off the TV Week.
The idea of being deprived of critical episodes of Friends, ER and Felicity -- even for one week -- threw me into such teenage strife that to say I was disagreeable to the idea would be putting it mildly. My parents were accustomed to me being disagreeable though, and without ceremony, the cord was yanked and the cable disconnected.
Clearly, the idea was that without the boob tube as a distraction, families would be compelled to gather in love and unity -- to play cards or bake or engage in familial conversations about relationships, the baby jesus and the meaning of life.
I was compelled to be somewhere with a television at 7pm on Thursday. If in the television’s absence my family discovered the meaning of life, I wasn’t home to hear about it.
Since moving to New York nearly a year ago, I have been television-free. Now, I do not own a television, but I will, from time to time, plop myself on my neighbor’s couch to indulge in highly intensive Reality TV binges. It’s therapy (think mind-erasers without the shot glass or esophageal burning). For the most part, though, I have no compelling connection to TV programming. I was unfazed by the end of the Friends dynasty and completely unaware that Buffy was no longer slaying vampires.
Another idol hath displaced TV. A greater idol and an infinitely greater distraction. I now care more if Leta is crawling. Or if I have an away message from Ari. Or if menupages.com has a listing for Ethiopian food.
I imagine that by the time I have children, Turn off the TV Week will have undergone a number of necessary alterations. Perhaps, Disconnect the Wireless Router Week or Hide the Blackberry in your Underwear Drawer Week. I’m not likely to force any of my progeny to participate, though. Because if I really wanted to find the meaning of life, I’d probably just have to Google it.
Imagine Turn Off Internet Week. Now, THAT would be painful...
I don't know what I would do if I couldn't surf the net, or even worse, if I couldn't talk on AIM.
Posted by: Pete at March 3, 2005 04:35 PMI'm more of a TV person at night and a Internet person during the day.
I envy you for not being surgically attached to the boob tube.
I think I'm going to begin my 12 steps of getting unaddicted to TV today!
:) "turn off the internet week" was my honeymoon and i ended up breaking down and checking email after only four days. it was rough. at home, if the cable modem goes out for over 15 minutes i get cranky.
i used to be a huge TV watcher before the internet. now i just record the shows i like (law & order, iron chef) with my DVR and watch them when i can. *sigh* i HEART technology.
Posted by: gleek at March 3, 2005 04:50 PMI have tried googling the meaning of life. I hate to spoil the surprise, but the first listing is for a movie of said name.
Such teases I tell you!
When I was young and spry, my mother would hound me to "Turn off the TV/Nintendo and read a book". While I do own and love a PS2(a christmas gift from my beloved, by the way) I spend all day in front of a Computer and the books I have un-read are piling up. Is it wrong to wish for non-life threatening hospital time to justify an escape from the office. I think I need a procedure.
Posted by: Mike at March 3, 2005 05:06 PMEvery so often, my job sends me to places in the world that the Internet is only starting to reach. Mainly these places are high in the Andes or deep into the African bush. If you can find an Internet cafe, you cannot believe how slow and expensive the connection is.
I have seriously withdrawls when I made these trips. No Yoplait, no Diet Coke and no Internet. I am happy that television isn't another needle in my arm. You can take a book nearly anywhere.
~AK
My TV comes on during spring training and gets turned off some time in October. Unfortunately, now that Buffy is off of the air (yes, I am a complete geek) there is nothing worth watching on TV except for my beloved baseball. How is that new laptop working out for you?
Posted by: Barry at March 3, 2005 05:27 PMWe have "No Meeting Day" once a month where I work, although we're all pushing for a "No E-mail Day" ...
I love the technology and all, but when I get back from an afternoon of meetings and have 25 new e-mails all marked "ASAP," I begin to wonder if it would really be THAT bad to turn it all off for a few days ...
Posted by: S at March 3, 2005 05:42 PMi, too, would suffer horribly if i had to be without an internet connection. tv? - bah, i can live without it. but no Fish? no Dooce? no stephanieklein? i'd rather cut my leg off with a dull knife. :)
when do our t-shirts start shipping?
Posted by: red at March 3, 2005 05:42 PMI really feel for you Fish. Turn off the TV week was all week every week for us growing up. No TV during the school week!!! Sucked big time. But I made friends with books, then a computer and of course Jesus. This was the beginning to becoming a dork and coming to odds about Jesus. On the flip side, the television is never off now. Lovely moving, sound making wallpaper.
Love your site and am catching up on archives. Thanks for the cool writing.
Posted by: Urban Echo at March 3, 2005 05:55 PMi used to be addicted to tv. now my only must sees are joan of arcadia and the gilmore girls. i visit you and several others everyday though, my favorite kind of reading these days. keep it up!
Posted by: ropedancer at March 3, 2005 06:06 PMFish, why do you hate the internet? It brings you news, sports, music and pornography instantly, whenever you want it. It has brought your prophetic word to thousands of people.
Plus if it hears you badmouthing it, it's gonna get pissed.
Posted by: G at March 3, 2005 06:26 PMGoogle has the answer for everything. Much, much better than sliced bread.
Posted by: robin alexa at March 3, 2005 06:32 PMI think the only time I really got on well without TV was when I was wintering with horses in Florida and I didn't have cable so I never really watched or I was working into the evening with my own horse into the evening that I didn't care. I think during those months I was either, riding, working or sleeping. Nowadays I can't leave the house on Thursdays without my VCR set.
Posted by: sushigirl at March 3, 2005 06:40 PMI hate to admit it but I could go weeks without TV but no more than three days without hearing about how Leta is doing.
Posted by: Jack at March 3, 2005 07:21 PMWell, I LOVE our couch squatting dinner and tv nights and your pseudo little bro over here does too :)
Posted by: Ari at March 3, 2005 07:39 PMHey Fish,
I read it and loved it. I passed on the bit about googling the meaning of life. My friend Gug (it's not a joke) replied:
"Google said:
The most widely believed answer to the meaning of life is 42. This is wrong. According to the hitch-hikers guide to the galaxy, this is the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and
everything. The actual meaning of life is a much smaller number, probably 14."
This is getting better and better! :)
my roomate and i tried 'unplug the internet' for lent... or at least a limit of 30 minutes per day. it hasn't been going so well.
Posted by: flora at March 4, 2005 12:13 AMWow. I can't imagine not owning a TV. But I bet because of it, you have imbibed more sweetness out of the fabulous city in which you live than many life-long residents have. What a terrific trade off that must be.
Posted by: Shanteuse at March 4, 2005 12:31 AMBest last line in a post ever!
Posted by: Lisa at March 4, 2005 09:24 AMFor me it would be the ultimate in irony to cut off the Internet to foster better communications with my family. My family is 1200 miles away and we communicate mostly through the Internet...and the free long distance calls I get at work. ;P
Posted by: ccs178 (Chris) at March 4, 2005 09:47 AMI have a TV, but I don't have cable, so I rarely watch it. When I need a cable fix I go to my parent's house. TV is really bad these days anyway, some shows have gone downhill.
Posted by: Milly at March 4, 2005 09:47 AMYay, Leta is crawling. Love the dooce and was extremely excited to see a reference. It is really a small blog-world
Posted by: She who shall not be named at March 4, 2005 12:37 PMI am very anti-television, but last year I buckled and got cable. It lasted a month before I gave them their stupid box back. If I have television around, I become a couch potato. I want to have more interesting things to talk about in life than what happened on "The O.C.".
Posted by: Jen at March 4, 2005 01:17 PMYou are all serious losers if you can't live without the internet for a week, or month... I am not attacking your personality (well, I am), but I work in an area where most of the families I help and people I work with do not even have computers, let alone internet. Stop being so self absorbed for a minute and be real.
Posted by: SpaceCowboy at March 4, 2005 02:30 PMDear Space Cowboy,
For starters, the world is sincerely lucky to have people like you who work to help those less fortunate. (For the record, I really mean that.) Notwithstanding your generous heart, you must have a very narrow mind if you cannot recognize "tongue in cheek" when you enounter it. (I really mean that, too.)
Most sincerely,
A Bunch of Losers
Posted by: Fish at March 4, 2005 02:33 PMLOL Fish, the Queen of the Comeback. *places crown on thisfish's head*
Now, I was going to say, I have not had television for seven years now. I own a television but in the Middle East there is pretty much only cable television or Arabic channels and even when I have bothered to have cable I never watched it!
Sometimes, I do not understand what people mean when they talk about things and I have been asked on occasion if I have been under a rock because I didn't know about something (usually reality TV based)...
Now, I am VERY intrigued by this reality TV trend, having studied pop culture at uni, and watch whenever I can but must say the internet has become my lifeline to the world and even THAT's heavily censored in the UAE. :(
It is true you can google anything these days! Look - it has become a verb! :)
Posted by: AdventureGirl at March 4, 2005 03:20 PMFish,
Why is it necessary that you have a "comeback" when someone posts a negative comment. Why are you so defensive. Just let it go, it shouldn't bother you, or are you really that insecure?
I love you Fish!!!
When I grow up....I wanna be just like you!!:)
Posted by: Mona at March 5, 2005 03:00 AMI don't know if that is such a good idea, Mona...
Posted by: Fish at March 5, 2005 10:04 AM:)
Posted by: AdventureGirl at March 5, 2005 11:23 AMI've just started reading your blog.... it is now one of my favorites. I needed to read something light and funny today.
~Jaime Chase
JaimeChase.com
Pretty funny stuff. My parents tried that when I was ten and I nearly had to be put in an insanasylum (did I spell that right? Oh well, you get my point, it means crazy house.) Try and visit my blog if you get the chance.
frankendick.blogspot.com
Good luck and keep writing,
Zach
Posted by: Zach Barger at March 5, 2005 09:16 PMif i got rid of TV i think we would all discover that i am really quite brilliant and capable of great things. which sounds like a lot of work. so for now, the TV stays.
Posted by: honestyrain at March 6, 2005 02:46 PMWhen I got pregnant I vowed I would turn off the TV during the day and just play music. I decided to get a job working at home to keep from becoming a daytime TV junkie. It's HOPELESS!! Like someelse said, it's like talking wallpaper. I remember when I last nursed the baby by what I was watching at the time. Good thing the TV isn't in the same room as the computer or I'd never work.
Posted by: Sarah at March 6, 2005 05:38 PMWe had no TV at our house in Kinsale, on the Southern coast of Ireland. But we had a beach and lots of open green space, plus rockpools and a ruined castle to explore. Dungeons, tunnels, days trying to get kites made of plastic bags to fly in no wind by sprinting up and down a field. Rolling down grassy hills became a sport, nay, an art form.
A 'No TV' day is no problem in my book.
My 'No alcohol' year, however, could be a different story. (It starts on Paddy's Day) People who are that easily amused without alcohol at my age are denounced as simpletons. They look at me funny when, aged 25, I suggest rolling down grassy hills or making 'kites' out of bags and string. Sober.
Sigh. Growing up, eh?
Posted by: Markham at March 6, 2005 07:04 PMhey, greetings from Singapore! Just dropping a note to say I love your blogs. Read a previous comment that you've grown boring? Come'on, I think life's a long straight line with its knots along the way, can't be always too excitable for our sanity's good eh?
Cheerios! Hope to read more of your blogs!
Oh, man. So true. I haven't had the patience for TV in six or seven years now, but the Internet is like heroin rolled in Swiss chocolate, addiction-wise.
Whatever, though. The Internet is way more informative than TV. Um, if the information is just random diary entries from people you've never met :P
Posted by: Jaime at March 7, 2005 11:45 AMI'm jealous of your TV-free existence. I keep trying to convince myself that I should at least cancel my cable & just watch DVDs, but I would miss the Red Sox games.
Or be forced to watch all of them in bars, and spend all my cable money and then some on beer.
Posted by: girlie so groovie at March 7, 2005 12:55 PMAh, that's something I hadn't thought of, good point! Since moving from Philadelphia to Prague, the only tv I watch is to help me learn Czech. But the blogs... oh, the blogs. I probably read more blogs than I EVER watched tv.
Posted by: paz at March 8, 2005 10:00 AMThe Internet is the same as TV. You gave up nothing. Just wait until those pesky pop ups become full fledged commercials - it's already starting.
Posted by: Dealmaker at March 9, 2005 10:39 AM