I’ve had this nervous feeling in my stomach for a few days now – this sick, achy feeling that says, Something is wrong. Very wrong. I wake up, and for the first few seconds, there’s nothing. And then BAM! Impending doom. And I’m usually right about these things, you know, so while I’m waiting for Doom to send me the email sitting is his Draft folder, let’s talk about happier things. Like my skinned knee.
I don’t believe I’ve skinned a knee in something like fifteen years, and holy cow – I don’t have a single accessible memory of how much that shit hurts! I was never a… graceful child, so skinned up was pretty much a constant state for me (between that and stubbed toes, I was the single largest consumer of Band Aids in greater Utah County). But I guess it’s like losing teeth – when I was a kid, I’d do just about anything to rip that thing out of my face for a lousy buck. Now? The idea makes me totally nauseated. I’d need at least a five-dollar incentive. Falling off a bike used to be no biggie, either. Now, I’m a little bit nervous to take up the Boy’s suggestion that I purchase one and go on two-wheel adventures with him. ADVENTURES IN DEATH. Which is simply further proof that this getting old thing is a little bit lame. Bills. Taxes. Near death experiences during child’s play. As for the skinned knee, I had a ridiculous amount of fun doing it (playing pool volleyball while subtly intoxicated by beer-ritas), but the whole thing where a part of my body that sees major play on any given day is missing its skin? No bueno.
Also no bueno but totally off topic? Kate Gosselin’s hair. Ordinarily I’d just leave her alone with her bad, bad, really bad porcupine haircut, but I’ve been reading a lot of crappy tabloid stuff while waiting for Doom to arrive and holy cow, she sure gets into herself, bragging that everyone (yes, she means you, too) wants it. Everyone. And if you haven’t admitted to wanting it, you’re in a whole heap of denial. No, no, no. Just take your kids off TV already.
And even more off topic but still pertinent: I miss LOST. Which is probably making me crabbier than normal.
omg, i TOTALLY skinned my knee this past weekend for the first time in years…and it does hurt like a sonofagun. how did we tolerate this pain as children?! not only that, but half of my leg is a beautiful shade of purpley-green. yummy. no shorts for me for at least a few weeks.
I totally agree about Kate. Her hair is about as awful as her personality.
I feel your pain: When I was young, people called me Grace because I had none. As I’ve aged, my coordination has improved, but I still bruise like a banana. It’s not fun at all – or attractive.
She’s TERRIBLE. The few times I watched the show I could only think about how miserable her husband must be because she is unbearably controlling and, well, a harpie.
I TOTALLY agree about Kate’s hair – horrid. But more importantly – what is a beer-rita? and how do I make one? I do love me a margarita.
I watch my first graders wiggle their loose teeth now and it gives me the willies, whereas when I was their age. Oh! How I loved doing that.
I love Jon and Kate and those kids (ridiculously adorable!), but I don’t like what the show has done to their lives – regardless of what Jon may or may not have done. I’d rather they end the show and try to work on their family, as it’s in much disarray.
And LOST…oh, how I miss thee. 2010 can’t come soon enough!
I know! What am I supposed to watch tonight? Oh well, starting over with Season 1 on DVD and so on…
I literally cried when the LOST: The Final Season – 2010 came on.
My irrational speculation will be WAY out of control by then.
Here’s hoping Doom’s been laid off.
i hate…HATE…hate that feeling…
Beer-ritas?? You must tell us more!
As for Kate–she needs to fix her hair, mellow out and take the kids off tv, you’re right!
I had the “impending doom” feeling every. single. day. while dating my husband. It sounds 100% insane, to the point of embarrassing, but it was because he was The One. I wanted to marry him so badly, and I was so terrified that he’d decide otherwise, so every day I was somewhere on the spectrum between nervous-thoughts-in-the-back-of-my-mind and going-to-puke-anxiety. For a year. Sounds fun, huh? I know, no. But I really did have fun with him, enjoyed every second, promise. That’s why I was so scared. See? Vicious circle. I thought I’d get over it when he proposed and I had a very lovely ring on my finger. Nope. Still nervous–even more, because I was even more invested. But happily it did go away the second we were saying our vows on Ke’e Beach, Kauai. Aaaah. That’s better.
*I have no idea if this has anything to do with *your* impending doom feeling, since you really didn’t give any details. But after the previous post (Venus and Mars), it was just a hunch. If that’s not why you’re feeling this way, then sorry for the totally off-topic comment, and good luck anyway.
If the relationship *is* the cause, then I wish you confidence and joy, and mind-numbing little fairies to make you forget all that anxiety. (if “mind-numbing fairies” = tequila, so be it)
I’m 32. I kicked the patio furniture about 4 months ago, and I’m still limping. I pulled a muscle near my kidney this weekend I never knew I had, just by COUGHING! To quote Garth, “I’m much too young to feel this damned old…”
We used to be regular Jon and Kate groupies, but somewhere in every episode my wife would let out, “Jon is a friggin SAINT!” I hate that he’s quit his job to take care of the kids full-time, while she’s made a career outside of the show just for being their mother. I predict this will successfully tank the show, which will bring Jon relief and Kate misery. Have you noticed that at the beginning of the series she had to have Jon pick her clothes for her, and now she looks like a fashionista just to go to the store?
I’m 32. I kicked the patio furniture about 4 months ago, and I’m still limping. I pulled a muscle near my kidney this weekend I never knew I had, just by COUGHING! To quote Garth, “I’m much too young to feel this damned old…”
We used to be regular Jon and Kate groupies, but somewhere in every episode my wife would let out, “Jon is a friggin SAINT!” I hate that he’s quit his job to take care of the kids full-time, while she’s made a career outside of the show just for being their mother. I predict this will successfully tank the show, which will bring Jon relief and Kate misery. Have you noticed that at the beginning of the series she had to have Jon pick her clothes for her, and now she looks like a fashionista just to go to the store?
it looks like whoever did Kate Gosselin’s hair changed their mind about what they were doing half way through styling it, then just didn’t bother fixing the other half
Your gut is trying to tell you something. Waking up with those somatic complaints every morning is not normal and is a sign that there is something serious that you “know” about but you have not dealt with. I hope you figure out what it is and can take steps to return to good health.
Im 31 years old and therefore old enough to know better….
Went to monaco grand prix last weekend, ended up drunk and lost at 3am, tried riding home on a pushbike, went off the kerb, ended up in the Nice (France) emergency room with a broken collarbone. Now THAT hurts.
excellent post. well said on kate. her hair is god awful. good luck with the whole bike thing. i have run marathons and really enjoy swimming, so you’d think a tri would be next up. nope. can’t do it. hate bikes. fear of falling and breaking my face at high rates of speed. cheers!
Haha…beer-ritas…I love it! Is this something that you continued from my pool parties last year or something that the Boy re-introduced to you?
FYI…new pool drink this summer…Miami Vice. I love the whole 80′s feel to it. Pina Colada and Strawberry Daquiri swirl.
Ah. Kate’s hair. Like she had a bob and someone started a pixie cut from the back then was just like “fuhgettaboutit”, set the scissors down, and walked away. Atrocious!
Poor Jon. The fact that she gave him a five dollar a day allowance?!?! And then to know she actually pays someone to cut her hair that way. hahaha.
The Beer-ritas sound delish. I’ve had wine-ritas, and they are somethin else!
I miss LOST, too!
Ohhhh I’m LOST without LOST too!!! I’d skin my knee AND pull out a loose tooth to see LOST
Thank heavens I have DVR and can watch old episodes. I miss so much just watching them once. Or twice. Or… who am I fooling? More than twice. heh