Hooboy, this wedding sure got D-I-Y in a hurry! Which, strangely, also means it suddenly got a whole lot more fun.
Today I am letting the potential caterers know that we’ve decided to go in another direction – the direction in which no one will take advantage of us. See, my brother is a very gifted hobbyist chef. My mother and youngest sister also have The Gift. Sister Number Two (there are three of them, if you’re new to my circus) gently pointed out that with all this talent – and so much willingness to put it to use – I was just being silly indulging these catering companies in their cat and mouse games.
Does doing the food by ourselves take a whole lot more planning and coordination? Why, yes, yes it does. But guess what? I don’t have to do it! Sister Number Two has volunteered her services as Logistics Director. This involves many spreadsheets, a big, fat notebook and loads of research and scheduling – all to her delight. Turns out, she really wanted to go the Do-it-Yourself route for her own wedding this year and got vetoed. The Hunter-Griffith Wedding will be her take two and she will kick some serious ass at it.
Jessalyn, of The Shoestring Bride, will be on hand for coordination on the day of the wedding so that no family members will be involved in back-of-house activities during the event. Period. Time will tell, but this might just be the smartest decision I ever make in my whole life.
Sister Number Three, Director of Photography, and my friend Eleanor have graciously committed to preserving the day in various digital formats. I don’t know how I feel about those newfangled HD camcorders but hey, we’re doing this for posterity.
Sister Number One, who will also be serving as Maid of Honor, has been assigned no tasks yet (aside from, you know, picking a dress). But now that I’ve decided not to let the disgustingly bloated wedding industry have a pound of my flesh, she’s probably going to find herself with some floral wire, a yard of ribbon and dozens of Whole Foods’ finest blooms.
All I have to do is make suggestions, nod and smile as others make the final decisions, and manage the budget. And you know how I love a good budget (it’s like built-in shelving for your dollars). Did I mention it’s a whole lot more fun this way? Because it is.
100% awesome!!
Most excellent news. Now you can ENJOY!
Totally awesome! If we’d had that kind of talent in-family we would have gone the DIY route, too. Good for you. I strongly dislike the wedding and baby “industries” and how they tell you what you just have to have!
It sounds like you’ll have a beautiful day.
I’m glad to hear how you’ve worked this out. I had the “perfect” overdone, expensive wedding. And divorced, I know with certainty that the *wedding* itself means, really, nothing. It’s the *marriage* that counts.
Oh, DIY is so the way to go. I’m doing as much of it on my own as well. Hobby Lobby has a great selection of fake flowers if you need ‘em!
I had a do it yourself wedding and I feel like it made it all the more special (and cheap!).
Best wishes to you!
Sounds fun! My cousin recently got married, and all the aunts put together the flower arrangements for the tables the day before. They had a great time doing it, and were really proud to tell everyone at the reception about their handiwork. (And everything looked great!)
Nicely done! I had a DIY wedding last October, and don’t regret a second of it. We did it in my father-in-law’s backyard. I bought flowers by the stem from a local florist on the day of, and my sister and best friend were in charge of making the bouquets. We found a local Mexican food joint that does great catering – street tacos, 8 tables, and 50 chairs for $500. Take that catering industry! A friend did our photos, and the cake was only $150. I don’t regret a single choice made. We paid for it all in cash. Totally worth it.
one of my best friends just got married and her flowers were gorgeous (and inexpensive). She got small clear vases, put some shells at the bottom, the stuck a couple gerber daisies and a handful of sea grass in each… I think she did 15 tables for under $100 and it was really lovely!
If you have talented (and willing) family and friends – and it sounds like you have that – DIY is the way to go! good luck
I must admit I’ve been worried for you and all this wedding planning stuff but, it appears that everything is falling into place ever so nicely for you.
Awesome! Enjoy it! Have fun!
Have I already told you how HAPPY I am for you? Been following your single life blog for a long time (many years), and you give me HOPE! Congrats, again!!! And I agree with the DIY wedding … That’s the way I’d do it if I ever get there!
Seriously, the wedding industry should be ashamed of itself. Being a bride was the worst thing ever when I had to deal with these wedding professionals who were just looking to capitalize on love and happiness: Don’t you think your wedding is special enough for monogrammed napkins?, No mention of gifts! What about my commission for referring you to X Department Store?
In response, I cut the ceremony to immediate family only and had it on a beach with dinner at the fanciest restaurant in town afterward, then had a very cool DIY reception a week later where we showed a condensed version of the ceremony on a projector to everyone else. That being said, don’t let anyone tell you what you should do. Wear a tiara– if that’s your deal (gulp).
Dropping in to agree, DIY is the way to go, and the fact that you have a ‘staff’ – even better! I’m DIY-ing most of my October wedding, even bedazzling my shoes (ok that was an extra side project, not necessary, but AWESOME) and while there have been moments when I’ve freaked out about something, I think I’m going to be really happy with the results.
This weekend I helped do the flowers for a 200K wedding (the flower budget was 20K. I will pause so you can laugh) and I thought “this hotel ballroom looks magical, the flowers are gorgeous, the ice sculpture adds some flare….and this wedding has absolutely positively NO personality whatsoever. I’m so glad you’re sticking to your guns and doing what you want. Don’t let anyone talk you out of it – you’ll have so much fun, and your wedding will actually feel like YOUR wedding, with all the personal touches and elements you’ve planned. Can’t wait to read more about your plans!
yay! It’s great to have friends/family who have both talent AND a willingness to help, that can be a rare combo! We DIY’d as much as we could, but weren’t able to do so with the big things which was kind of a bummer. BUT – we still did what we wanted to do and had a great time without all the so called must haves.
Have fun! Here’s another website that may come in handy (if you haven’t already found it): http://www.save-on-crafts.com/. A friend of mine & I ordered items from there & we were both very satisfied.
Awesome!
You may want to check to see if your local floral market is open to all or just to the trade. It can be a great cheap resource. And if you have Trader Joe’s, their flowers are often scads cheaper than Whole Foods.
Sounds wonderful!
Hmmm… I’m pretty sure we don’t have a Trader Joe’s anywhere near here. I guess I’m not concerned with the price at WF because one, it will be tons cheaper than a florist no matter what ($75 for a 12-stem bouquet, what?!) and two, they will be nicer quality than your grab-n-go flower shop.
One more thought for flowers….we just had a fundraising event (for my oh-so-impoverished non profit place of employment) and ordered the flowers off the internet. Scads cheaper than WF, Central Mkt, etc. Look online! It’s cheap and they’re lovely.
Good for you! I just acted as caterer/minister at my best friend’s beach wedding. Flowers were bought from WF and a few were also liberated from a neighbors yard which made for an inexpensive/beautiful wedding. DIY is the way to go, that way it ends up exactly as you see it.
Awesomeness! Way to go. I am indulging in a few of the wedding industry types, but there are plenty of other things I’m doing on my own. Makes it more personal as well.
I second the recommendation to look for your flowers online!
But! But I only need like, two dozen flowers TOTAL. That’s it. We’re only doing cut flowers for the bouquets. Paying shipping for 24 flowers seems silly.
Can I borrow your sisters and brother for my wedding? Will they travel to Missouri?? So glad to read this post…it makes me think maybe I’ll be able to handle a DIY wedding, too
Congratulations! I went the DIY route as well (sadly I had to have a caterer as no one in my family cooks). One piece of unsolicited advice: see if there’s a wholesale flower market in your neck of the woods. You’ll save some serious cash and be able to buy as many flowers as you want. Most places allow people without a wholesale license to buy during certain hours. Another place for cheap blooms is Costco but the selection is hit or miss.
It sounds like it’s going to be a kick-ass party. You’ll never regret spending too little.
My sister’s wedding florist screwed up, so we ended up having DIY flowers at the last minute. And they were beautiful, and no one noticed that they weren’t from a florist. Just imagine what they could have been if we had planned to do them ourselves!
Also, that florist is now out of business.
As a soon-to-be-married myself, I love that you’re going DIY (and sharing it with us).
Yah for you! And coincidentally yah for me, I’m stealing all these tips and thoughtful readers website recommendations for my own DIY wedding. Thanks y’all!
LOVE this!! You can just feel the warmth of family coming together.
I must say that you are going to have the most wonderful wedding EVAH! Why? Because you are having everything to your choice, not the best of what they have to offer. Your family is involved and will be helping you through the days which is a bonus. I know all about low stress weddings. My mom’s best friend was a wedding coordinater and caterer. I had thus been to several of her creations. When my big day approached, I went to see Carol and, since she had known me since I was 6, was able to sit down and tell her just the colors I wanted to use with some flower choices and she knew what my favorite things to eat were. Wedding and reception planned in 20 minutes. Super deal on price, since I was almost one of her kids.
FWIW, I lived for a number of years in a place where buffet dinners at weddings were the norm, and they were every bit as fun as the fancier ones.
so jealous! good for you!
after being engaged for two years, and having very talented mother and future-mother-in-law i was hoping for someone to offer DIY wedding food. i hinted, and hinted, and hinted for like, 14 months, to no avail. apparently your family loves you more than my family loves me
just kidding of course, but i am envious! luckily we were able to snag catering for under 60 per person, for a saturday event, with an open bar after MUCH haggling but i do love DIY weddings so much.
i’m DIYing the flowers/invites/favors/centerpieces though.
good luck!
I’ve helped no less than A BILLION friends with D-I-Y wedding tasks. It’s all about the planning…your love for spreadsheets will serve you well!
I love this whole post. Your wedding day will feel so much more real because you chose to do it this way, and with time, you will appreciate the effects of that choice more and more. Congratulations, bride!
Congratulations for deciding to do so many $$$-sucking wedding things yourself! That said, can I suggest something about the photos? If there are unique places that mean a lot to you and your man, have a wedding photo taken there. For instance, a friend of mine had lived in her parents house up until the day she was married, so she had a photo taken of her in her wedding dress with her parents on the front porch (showing the address numbers next to the mail box). Cute!
Good luck!
So happy for you! Our wedding was also DIY and it took place at home, which made it all the more meaningful to me. Also, I was able to spend a little more on details that I thought were cute. For example, I ordered personalized wine and champagne labels at http://www.bottleyourbrand.com. Really cute! About the flowers, I ordered mine from this guy who sells them right by where I work, and I had bought tons from him before, so I knew how sturdy they were, and how far in advance to buy them to make sure they were open and at their prettiest on the day. Also, I spent HOURS watching Martha Stewart wedding DVDs, which had tons of ideas, and showed you how to create bouquets, favors, even makeup and hair!
All in all, my husband still says I should be a wedding planner with all the information I acquired. So much fun.
I’m so glad that the wedding issues are working out so well, and that your family is working with you on these!!
Here’s hoping that, in about 5-10-20-plus years, you and your family look back on this and say, “that was SO much fun!! What a great wedding!”
Hi hi hi.. and YAY. I’ve been reading your blog for years too, and we met our Dork Lords within a month of each other, and I got engaged 2 weeks ago so I’m ALL OVER turning this into a DIY blog if you so desire (or! or! you can make a separate DIY wedding blog like you did when you went backpacking around Europe! Like how I say that like I know you?). I’ve been WAITING for some news about wedding planning so I’m so happy to read this. We just last night decided on a budget so puh-leaze help when it comes to telling us what you decide to do! And have you seen this? I-Do-It-Yourself.com
Yay!
Congratulations- now you’re building the event that starts your life together much like you will build said life. I can’t think of a better way to start a marriage!
A) Congratulations! DIY weddings are so much more fun and personal!
B) My advice is to skip WF for the flowers (though they do have lovely, fresh ones) and hit up your local farmer’s market instead. I did a friend’s flowers for her DIY wedding last summer and managed to score tons and tons of lush seasonal blooms from the farmer’s market PLUS all the stuff to actually make the bouquets (floral tape, pins, ribbons, etc.) from a nearby craft store all for under $100. Score!
Awesome!
I just had a very DIY wedding this June – it was wonderful! It took some prep time (in the months before and day of), but it was simple, inexpensive, and lovely. We got a guy to grill some brats, and we made the appetizers and provided drinks… and we did a “top your own cupcake” station (so all we had to buy were cheap unfrosted cupcakes and some cans of icing, m&ms, etc.). We also bought bulk wildflowers and arranged them, I did my own hair and make-up, we didn’t have attendants, we had an ipod for music, we hired a photographer off of craigslist who’s just starting out in the wedding business, and we had lots of outdoor games (pinata, bubble wands, bocce ball). It was a blast. Sounds like yours will be, too!