We’d started out thinking Disneyworld. But when, after a quick internet search, it became clear that Walt’s wonderland was just a teensy bit out of our budgets, we settled on something a little closer, but every bit as exciting.
This weekend, Sarah and I are paying a visit to our nation’s capital.
Both Washington DC virgins, we’ve been talking about this trip for weeks now. In the middle of a sea of crapass workdays and personal drama, Washington DC has been our life raft. A girl has to have something to look forward to! And in looking forward, we’ve exchanged literally hundreds of emails making plans, train and hotel reservations, and drafting itineraries of the most alluring of the city’s attractions: The Spy Museum (!), Capitol Hill, and of course, the Lincoln Memorial.
“I am seriously so excited about this trip. It’s all that’s keeping me going.”
“It’s going to be so great. Even if it rains. It’ll be like, a wet t-shirt contest with Lincoln as the judge.”
“Well, and then there was that… the best sentence ever invented.”
Nobody loves Honest Abe more than Sarah does. Nobody. And I decided early on that if I have to get arrested so that she can have a memorable moment with him, well, then so be it.
“If want to curl up and take a nap in the Lincoln Memorial’s lap, will you distract the guards?”
“And here I thought you’d try to molest him. But either way, yes, I got your back.”
“I knew I could count on you. Oh, and I just looked; we have perfect weather all weekend!”
“Great! I mean, Abe is going to be a little disappointed, but he’ll get over it. I mean, he’s been shot for god’s sake. Missing a wet t-shirt contest won’t kill him.”
Mamas, lock up your assassinated ex-presidents!
Er, um, something like that. And if you don’t hear from us on Monday? Send legal assistance.