I came home last night a smidge away from drunk and feeling snacky. So I sat down and ate half a box of cereal. Super good-for-your-heart, high fiber cereal. You can imagine how awesome I feel right about now. Even better, I’m taking off to Austin in an hour to help my little sister move apartments (I know! I deserve medals!). I can only imagine what an excellent car ride that is going to be. Can you die of too much fiber? I mean, it seems entirely possible at this juncture.
Sometimes I feel like I live in a sitcom. And not in the good way where my hair always looks fantastic and I get to make out with Magnum P.I.
Mmmmm. Magnum.
You must be in so much pain. Fiber turns me inside out… and not in a good way.
bless your heart.
Ha ha. My life IS a sitcom. It’s just for other peoples’ amusement, and none for me, as it has been turning out.
Maybe you should pop an Imodium A.D. pill? We runners take that before long races (i.e. marathons) to prevent our high fibrous dinners and breakfasts, or mere nervousness during the warm up to keep us from having to go to the portapots unnecessarily during the race. Just a suggestion. Perhaps 3 hours won’t be that long for you? Bring TP too, because besides Waco, I wouldn’t know where else to stop! (Although one could imagine that being in the 21st century that we are, there’d be plenty of decent rest stops along the way.)
Do you KNOW how many times I’ve done that? way way way too many. drink water, flush it out. Call it a cleansing and move on.
For the record, it is because of this that I no longer keep cereal (or any bulk snack food for that matter) in the apartment.
All I can say is Mapquest some rest stops. You’re gonna need them…lol
hope everything comes out all right.
(sorry, i couldn’t help it.)
As long as you keep a window cracked, you shouldn’t die.
Like John said, if it gets too bad, take an Immodium…the advanced will control gas…uh…so I’ve been told.
Anything done in extremes is bad… you can die from drinking too much water…
In a COMPLETE non sequitur…
Have you seen the new Dove shampoo commercial? The girl in it (the non-curly haired one) looks like she could be your sister…
Well just think of this as one of those expensive holistic colon cleanses for free, sans the bed liners and lube.
By the way, I have a feeling your little house locks would fit in quite nicely on any sitcom set. But how they make those perfect frizzless waves is beyond my comprehension.
That’ll teach you NOT to eat chocolate, doritos and popcorn when you are drunk! **** Taco Bell would have even been better! hehe
successful use of fibre and Magnum in one post
now that’s talent
happy trails …
Way outta left field but did you catch Det Stabler on Celebrity Jeopardy? He won and looked quite sexy while doing so.
Although he was unfortunately all covered up in a jacket.
Some mistakes you only makes once… like eating a whole package of prunes in one sitting.
Or buying those delicious looking tacos from the little roadside stand.
I do that all the time. My personal favorite though, is when I stop at the store on my way home, buy 3x as many snacks as I need (because, you know, they all look good when you’re a little tipsy & I’m not sure what I want), and proceed to eat more than I should. Oh, yeah, these are usually of a high-fiber variety as well.
As far as helping your sister move, right up there as part of the criteria for sainthood in my eyes.
Hope you fared well!
Isn’t Magnum P.I. some kind of crypto-fascist in real life? You’re probably not missing anything.
Also, isn’t heroin meant to have to opposite effect of fiber? Is it too late to start?
It’s a chase Manhattan / best buy world. We just live in it. Crass or practical joke. You decide. I like fiber optics.
Your interesting post compelled me to add the ‘song for every occassion’. ‘We welcome you to crackerbox palace.’ by George Harrison. The cracker is your fiber. He told Madonna while filming ‘Shanghai Surprise’ that life is a big cartoon.
Haha, oh…dying from too much fiber? You might feel like you’re dying when it comes um, out…so hopefully you drink lots of water =] (jeez, my nutrition major is making me a busybody!)
My favorite snack when my liver is working out is either frozen grapes with dark chocolate or 1 pint each of green tea and expresso ice cream. Hmm. Then again, a sweet pair of lips might be just as enticing…haha!
a friend of mine did that onec while stoned. i think it was bran buds…..she spent most of the night on the toilet, some of it sleeping!
joannek:-
Frozen grapes, I’ve heard of. But with chocolate? I’m intrigued. What do you do? Just eat the chocolate as is, or do you melt it and drip the frozen grapes in it? I’m curious, because dark chocolate’s got a bite to it, and grapes can be sour and have a bitter after taste. But I’m willing to try new things though. =)
well fish … as they say (sometimes) …. “fibre this” …. as far as sitcoms go i work for the provincial government here in Ontario and believe me it couldnt be more of a sitcom than that
magnum? that’s the cheesiest thing you’ve ever said. now if you said higgins that would be funny…
Ah hahaa! I think I did the same thing yesterday. I ate something that didn’t sit well for brunch, so instead of eating dinner, I munched on a bunch of high fiber cereal. By 10 pm, my stomach was ANGRY.