Sir Hal is at the vet’s right now, getting surgerized. I’m at my desk right now, feeling a little nauseated over the whole thing.
See, Hal is one of those low, low, low maintenance pets. I let him do his thing and he lets me know when he wants something. Like, when his food bowl is empty, I simply fill it to the top and then he lets me know when my filling skills are again required. He’ll walk over, make physical contact (usually a headbutt) and then lure me to his dish. Sometimes he’ll headbutt the bag for added impact. Then he likes me to pet his head for a bit while he eats. But only for a bit, because too much affection can spoil a meal.
Saturday night, we came home from a party and I followed the beast upstairs to attend to some midnight cat snackin’. Hal’s bowl was full. As full as it had been when I filled it… a week before. Panic at the disco. I watched as Hal picked up a pieced of food in his mouth and let it fall right back into the bowl. A million worries started to go through my mind. I spun around to check the litter box (let’s just get this out of the way, hmm? I clean that thing once a week. I am not a vigilant scooper. Go on, judge me!) and it was empty. His excellency had not eaten in a week. Turning back, I saw him pick up another piece of food, maneuver it in his mouth and begin to cry. My cat was crying. Like an infant. I thought about dying right there on the spot because that would have been easier than seeing him go through that.
I immediately scooped him up and took him downstairs where I opened a can of tuna and watched him gingerly eat it. When he was finished, I tried to have a looksee into his mouth, but he was having none of it. Well, this morning, the vet took his turn and sure enough, Hal required surgery. And tests. More than a few tests. I’m fuzzy on the details – waiting for the nurse to call me with an update – but the vet said Hal was in excruciating pain. And hearing that filled me with the most potent feeling of remorse and guilt I’ve ever experienced.
“I had no idea,” I said, lump in my throat and tears burning at the corners of my eyes.
“What do you do for a living?”
“I, uh..”
“Cat dentist?” He shook his head. “Obviously not. You couldn’t have known.”
I don’t care. Because Hal doesn’t know that I’m not a cat dentist. He’s hurt and scared and I am the one who’s supposed to be looking out for him. Work is dragging most uncomfortably because all I want to do is take him home and put a stop to all the being frightened and in pain.
Parenthood is going to destroy me.
Oh- pooooor Kitty Cat!!!! Hal sounds like my Kenny, and if he is, Hal will be totally fine and back to his kitty-self soon!
i too get totally(read- extremely) overly emotional when i have a sick kitty, i feel like i should have known and i am the worst kitty friend EVER!!!!! plus the vet telling me, “it probably did Kenny good not to eat for a few days….. he is obese you know” DOESN’T help at all!
just brace yourself for the bill- and keep reminding yourslef exactly HAll is soooooo worth every single cent of that bill and all will be well.
and if you figure that over the years Hal has low maintenance… then it all averages out!
tell Hal i said mer*mer*prrrr (he will know what it means!)
Oh, no! Poor Hal
Best wishes to him for a speedy recovery!
Sir Hal! So sorry to hear of your plight.
Good luck and get well soon!
After years of reading, I know what a devoted mom you are, and Hal knows too. He’s gonna be OK… And you are too! Hope that moment comes soon and doesn’t cost a small fortune.
oh no!! I’m so sorry. I have bunnies, and they hide their pain or illness until it is pretty all consuming, so I have also had to race to the vet & then sit by the phone while they get worked on. It SUCKS.
He’s in good hands now – hang in there!! And don’t beat yourself up about it – you did all you could as soon as you knew something was up.
hang in there…he’ll be headbutting again in no time. Cats are super resilient. We’ve been through so many “oh god, she won’t make it” moments with my cat and yet, she bounces back EVERY time and acts as if she never even remembers being sick or in pain.
But as the kitty-mom, that helpless feeling, and not being able to tell her what’s going on, and that I’m sorry she’s hurting is really hard to deal with, I know.
You just made me cry at my desk (and my co-worker is looking at me funny). I’m so sorry he’s sick.
Poor, poor Hal. Cats are horrible at letting their owners know something is wrong, so don’t beat yourself up. If I knew you in person I’d give you a hug, but a *hug* will have to do instead.
You made me tear up, as well… Best wishes to Hal for a speedy recovery!
And, it is much simpler to notice a cat is limping than to notice he is having trouble eating. Don’t be too hard on yourself!
A similar thing happened with my kitty Mocha just last year. I couldn’t find her anywhere when I came home from work only to find her hiding in the closet. She never even goes into the closet so I was panicked. Mocha has been through two bouts of cancer and I would much rather me be the one sick than her. I rushed her to the vet the next morning – sick with guilt and worry. Mocha got an antibiotic shot and immediate dental cleaning. She had to have more than a few teeth removed but as soon as she came home she was as good as new. Yes, she looks a little kooky now since one of her “fang” teeth had to be removed (and she had lost another one a year prior) but her recovery was immediate. She is 14 years old, has only 3 legs, has likely used up 3 of her 9 lives, and is still spunky and playful – not for as lengthy periods of time as when she was a kitten but with as much vigor – and with a coat that is still soft and full.
Sir Hal will be fine, even is his mom is a ball of nerves. It just goes to show how good of a mom you will be to little human babies.
Speedy recovery to Sir Hal. Poor little thing. They really need to learn how to write. A nice note on your pillow would have done wonders. All it would have to say was, “Ouch. Love, Hal.”
You will be fine with a human child. They are much higher maintenance than furry ones and have no issues with letting you know how when something is not right. Promise.
I really hope your cat feels better! Cats don’t complain much, so it’s hard to tell when they need more attention.
Best wishes to you and Sir Hal! I have 2 cats myself. Cats are basically wild animals and are very good at hiding pain. Don’t feel too bad that you missed the signs. Our vet suggested to us that we get a baby scale (which we did, thinking we would someday use it for a baby as well, which we do) because the first symptom of kitty illness is usually weight loss.
I’m so sorry Fish to hear about Hal. Sending him lots of furry love and positive thoughts. I have 2 cats, and when they have been ill, I’ve dealt with guilt too. It’s hard to not know, and our vet told us that cats actually will mask pain and try to keep it to themselves. Ironically, our big fluffy orange guy ate a flower and twas poisonous, but we had no idea he ate it! When we noticed him drooling and not eating we took him to the vet, and he proceed to act NORMAL! No drooling! Silly guy was so scared of the vet, he pretended everything was fine. They really are masters of disguise!
I hope Hal gets better soon.
Poor thing (both of you). Cats really hide pain- don’t feel terrible! Having just had a very sick cat, i will say that as your cat gets older, it can be helpful to keep a close eye on the litter box and food issues.
People ask us why we check the elephants’ feet everyday. It’s because animals instinctively hide any problems that might make them appear weak or vulnerable. An elephant may step on something sharp, but walk like normal to cover it up. Hal was doing what survival instinct told him to do. Isn’t it nice that his next instinct was to come to you and show you his problem? He trusts you and loves you.
I love you too, lady.
I feel your pain. I’m a newly married gal, and my hubby and I decided to get a dog. Three weeks in (aka, last week), my beautiful 2 year old dog had 5 seizures in one day. I’ve been taking care of her and analyzing her every movement. The stress and anxiety are overwhelming, and for the first time in my life I question whether or not I could actually have children without dedicating my life to extreme worry and restlessness. It’s so hard when your pet can’t just tell you how they feel. Hope your furry friend feels better soon…
My cat showed similar symptoms last year: pain, unable to eat, bad breath. When I took her to the vet, he said her teeth were being reabsorbed—and he’d have to pull them for $2,000. I procrastinated, and fed her human baby food (pureed veal was her favorite) for a few days just to keep her going. She did a total 360, and never needed the surgery. Good luck with yours.
So sorry about Sir Hal and hope he gets better soon..
I freak out over pets more….well – if you count crying during pet rescue/vet shows vs human hospital reality shows….I guess it is because they can’t tell you what is wrong and they love you so unconditionally
Hope Sir Hal is gonna be okay xo
I feel for you. My boy Dio, who like Hal isn’t a talker or wants alot of fuss got very sick last year to the point where I had to force feed him. Among other things he had a glandular infection which was resistant to antibiotics. After weeks of giving him pills twice a day, I then had to give him an addition dose of tetracyclin three times a day (on an empty stomach). Poor guy got to the point where he would run and hide under the bed when I came home from work just because he had had enough. He’s better now and happy and cuddly as ever. Breaks your heart.
Poor Sir Hal! I hope he’s back to his normal self as soon as possible.
I totally understand your feelings of guilt. My cat had a horrible case of fleas and I didn’t know for two whole months. His butt hair still has yet to grow back.
Heather, I’ll repeat what a few posters have already pointed out. Cats will do almost anything to hide illness/pain/disability because in the wild, if you’re weak or sick, you’re dinner. It’s their nature. A dog will run over and share every symptom and tell you all about his surgery, because dogs are descended from the hunters. They were rarely the entree.
The night our beloved Siamese was obviously dying, we placed her on our bed and lay with her, stroking her and whispering to her (it was the middle of the night and the trip to the emergency vet to euthanize her would probably have killed her before we even arrived). At around 4:45 AM, she yowled and moved all 4 legs as if though she was trying to run away. Even in her last few seconds, she wanted to get away & hide. Then she was gone.
Hal, however, will return home tonight feeling 99% better because cats heal really fast. You will shower him with guilt affection and attention, and he will be annoyed. And all will be back to normal.
Heather, I totally feel your pain! I always thought I would make a great mom until I adopted a cat who had almost continual health problems. I am a stressed-out, guilt-ridden mess when any sentient being for which I am responsible is sick or in pain!
On the upside, it sounds like Hal’s issue is fairly straightforward, and I’m sure he’ll rebound with a head-butt and a “Thank you, Mommy!” Hang in there.
(hugs) i know the feeling. sending positive vibes to you and hal
@ n: what a beautiful reminder. You made a great connection for me between a workshop I was in this weekend and Heather & Sir Hal’s woes! To wit: all our interior critical voices, our doubts, our fears and insecurities are helpers that are doing their best darn job to protect us! That doesn’t mean they are necessarily our best allies, but they have a purpose, and get our thanks. Even if it’s time to go to Plan B, like Sir Hal did.
@ Heather: Dear Sir Hal is going to be in need of your care and attention when he comes home– but not your guilt. It’s clear you are a conscientious and loving companion for him; as n said, he trusted you to show you his vulnerability and ask for help. Love him lots (as though I have to even say that!) and help him over any trauma from the unavoidable ordeal in whatever way you and Sir Hal figure out is best. It sounds like Mr. Low Maintenance is also Mr. Communicative, and he’ll let you know what he needs.
(And all the obvious love in your post made me miss my own furbus so much! as I’m in transition, she’s staying with family until I get settled. When those we love hurt, it really is the most uncontrollable, gut wrenching pain!)
p.s. I feel like a dip for getting the whole drivers license thing confused! Thanks for clearing it up.
I’m so sorry about Hal!! Poor kitty!! He will be OK – they’ll fix him right up and he’ll eat and purr and head-butt, and all will be forgotten.
Besides. It is not always easy to tell when an animal is in pain. As has already been mentioned, animals who let others know they are injured or sick get eaten. It’ll be OK.
As the mother to two dogs, a cat and a 6 week old daughter, I have to say the parallels are amazing. However, based on how well you car for Sir Hal, I think your future children are in good hands. But yes, it is hard when they’re hurting. It’s not any easier when it’s a crying baby!
I’m crossing fingers and toes for Hal – and let us know if there’s a way to help with the vet bill!
Checking back in. How’s he doing?
oh no! i’m so sorry that hal isn’t feeling well.
and as a fellow cat-person i think you just lived through my worst nightmare! i become OBSESSED when the food isn’t being eaten quite as quickly and i’ve been known to inspect the litter box a few times too.
cats are such low maintenance that it’s hard to ever know when something is up.
here’s to hoping your day goes faster and that you get some good news from the vet later on.
AWW poor Hal! I’m sure he’ll be just fine! My cat got sick a year ago and he was crying too, howling and grumbling, actually. My husband and decided to wait till the morning to take him to the vet.
It turns out he had a blockage in his urinary tract. The nurse said he should have died overnight, but he hung in there. I felt AWFUL! I was pretty sure I was the worst cat mom in the world! $2000 and 4 days later, he came home.
I have never forgiven myself for that. I watch him like a hawk now (the vet said it could happen again) and I am a complete nut about making sure he eats the right foods and drinks enough water.
I am totally with you on this. I am going to be a totally psycho mom.
Poor kitty
I hope that he gets better really soon!
I know how you feel. It’s the worst, helpless feeling when our pets get sick. The good news is that it sounds like the vet knows what the problem is and is working on making him all better.
So sorry about Sir Hal, hope you both will be better soon. It can be hard to read when your pet is sick no matter how vigilante you are.
Can we get an update Heather? How’s the poor little kitty? Hopefully he and your wallet are okay!
Sorry to hear about Hal, cats are notorious for hiding anything thats is going on, my little guy has FIP and isn’t eating much, he lost a ton of weight and my boyfriend and i have been goign crazy trying to find something to help him keep the weight on. If Hal needs to gain anything back Nutrical is a great suppliment, its is a goo that they are supposed to like(mine hates it) and also plain boiled chicken seems to be really doing the trick, its nice and soft and he loves the taste.
good luck!
It’s such a horrible feeling when pets get sick. I hope kitty (and you) are doing better!