I’m getting married in three weeks and last night was the first time I felt, even in the slightest bit, like a bride.
Event planner, travel agent, project manager, bookkeeper, cleaning crew, construction worker, courier. Every day, an endless combination of roles – but never once bride.
“I know, I know, you’re trying to get out of here and I just want to play,” the seamstress said, smoothing my hair to pin a feather in it. “But playing is the fun part.”
She stretched a birdcage veil across my face and gave a self-satisfied, Mm hmm. “Oh, yes. That’s very nice.”
I looked in the mirror and tried very hard to imagine it all coming together. The pile of fabric on the daybed in her spare bedroom pieced together in an actual dress. The paint on my nails coming from a manicurist’s bottle and not a two-gallon jug of Killz primer. My friends and family in the same room instead of addresses on a reply-to-all.
It was brief. A quick flutter of excitement. Anticipation.The birdcage didn’t suit me, but it did something. I sighed and smiled.
Then there was a text message from the contractor, followed quickly by an auto reminder to send the mortgage payment, and blip! that something was gone. But for a minute, I got it. And it was sort of nice. Like playing dress up and having your sister braid your hair and making sweet, naive plans about the future. Really sort of nice.
ahhhh…its been awhile since I have gotten to catch up — I’m glad it made it, I am very happy that you allowed yourself that moment to feel IT…and I am hoping that in 3 weeks you give yourself over to all those bridal feelings and forget everything else, except how special that day is to you and the boy. Much love! ~kc
It’s a magical feeling…a flutter or butterflies…a hold-your-breath-and-remember-this-moment-forever feeling…it sneaks up on you! I had mine with my now sister-in-law with the first dress I tried on. It was THE dress but beautiful and it suddenly was REAL… Right there in the bridal shop, I started to cry…it was scary and wonderful all at once!
Congratulations Fish – I’m extremely happy for you both!
The moments are fleeting (I got married in Sept. 2010) but really exciting. Reality always sets in. But in the days leading up to and a few after, there is a buzz in the air that is pure excitement. Congratulations.
Chill bumps! Enjoy being a bride as much as you possibly can. It is so hard to for some reason. Life gets in the way
It seems oddly appropriate that I read this after getting up at 3 am to watch the most famous bride in the world get married.
I don’t know you Fish, but I offer my sincere best wishes to you. I hope your wedding is everything you want it to be, and a bag of chips
It was the veil that did it for me, too. Before that, it was more like prom, trying on fancy dresses that only semi fit and tended to itch if they went overboard with the sparkly bits. But add a veil, and it makes it real. So happy that it sounds like your seamstress will be able to make a dreamy dress for you after all the troubles.
Enjoy those little flutters. The real fun, for me, was the day after the wedding, when I kept thinking, “I’m MARRIED.” It was weird. In a really good way.
Enjoy every minute of it, Heather. You so deserve it.
its something about veils… i guess because its the only time in our lives most of us will wear one?
Sadly, one of the downfalls to being so involved in all of the aspects of your own wedding is that you do feel like a planner… however, i wouldnt have changed it – sure, putting boutineers together in the middle of my hair appointment was stressful, but i found the whole thing much MORE stressful during those moments when my only job was to be the bride… I dont do that role well and from everything i’ve read here, you probably dont either…
kate middleton did her own makeup. DIY/control-freak brides, FTW!
I’m a little less than 6 months away from my own wedding and I too feel more like a planner (and worrier) and less like a bride. I can’t wait for that feeling you just had – where I feel (and look) like a bride and get to have some pure excitement and enjoyment for once!
It’s going to be awesome – I can’t wait to hear how it all plays out for you!!! Congrats again!
the veil will get ya every time!
As bride to be this post gave me chills and reminded me to slow down and enjoy the next few months. Thanks Fish! I wish you all the best!
Ahem. This got me all sorts of choked up. Tear, sniff, tear. I have been reading you for something like 6 years now and I am so happy for you. Even though I have never met you I think of you as a friend (weird…) and am so excited for you to be Mr. & Mrs. Dork Lord and Fish.
Try really hard to soak in those bride moments on the actual day. It goes by so fast. And then you find yourself just looking at the pictures thinking “wow I WAS a bride.”
Project manager? That warms the cockles of my heart! (Speaking of which, you are getting to the 500 hour mark.) LOL
Listen, everything will work out fine. Just BREEEEEEATHE! All the best to you and the DL.
It is certainly understandable that you haven’t had time to revel in your bride-to-be status since you have had practically EVERY MAJOR life stressor going on in the past few months! I really hope that you can find a way to ease up on some of the have-to’s of owning a new home in the next weeks so you can try to hang on to some pre-wedding giddiness or I’m afraid that you will regret not having time for those emotions.
I hope you get more moments as the big day nears! Even if you do not want the focus on you, it is nice to feel special and get warm fuzzies!
I. can’t. wait.
It will come and when it does, all the work will totally be worth it. I promise, all the stress and pain will not matter and you will be happy, it will come together exactly how it was supposed to, which may not be perfect, but perfectly you guy’s day!!!
I’m so happy that the material arrived and that your seamstress is so positive. You needed some good things to happen after the last while. And YAY! for some actual bride butterflies. Those are the best part of the wedding experience.
Well, that and the whole marrying your best friend thing.