We were standing in the bathroom the other night, flossing or what have you, when the Dork Lord took a long look at my belly.
“There’s an actual baby in there. It’s going to be born and then we have to take care of it.”
“That’s sorta how this works, yes.”
“I can barely take care of myself!”
I snickered. “Well, that’s why I’m here, yeah?”
It wasn’t the first minor freak out either of us has had. It’s sure not to be the last. We’re half-way through this pregnancy and it still doesn’t register all that often that it’s real. Our little guppy is a manchild. We’ve known this for weeks and weeks thanks to a relatively new blood test that identifies the baby’s genetic information floating around in my genetic information and BAM! reveals possible chromosomal abnormalities and the baby’s sex. Our 18-week check up was a while back (the Penis Unveiling, the Dork Lord calls it) and everything seems to be just as it should. Ten fingers, ten toes, four heart chambers and discernible stubbornness.
His name is Charlie. You can pretty much call him anything you want as long as that anything you want is not ‘Chuck.’
We’re at the point where I can sense the motion of him wiggling around in there quite a bit, though individual kicks and karate chops are just starting to catch my attention. It’s all very science fiction-y and very distracting. Then sometimes I don’t feel him and that’s even more distracting. So this weekend, I ordered one of those hand-held Doppler jobbies so I could listen to Charlie’s heartbeat at will. It arrived yesterday and is now my favorite battery operated device. It took a while, digging around on my belly, to find that heartbeat, but once I did, it was like getting a report card. A plus, plus, plus!
A few weeks ago, I had my very first full blown, I’m pregnant so I can’t take my meds migraine. It was 26 hours of unmitigated torture. I figure Charlie owes me. He’ll be pretty new to the job for the first Mother’s Day, so I’m gonna give him a year to figure out how best to say Thank You for Not Poisoning Me. I do love sapphires.
Thank you for all the well-wishing! We are so thrilled and terrified. But mostly thrilled.